Zombie Digest

UPDATE: AHS, OUAT, GRIMM, and everything else.

2011-11-01T09:02:00.000-07:00

American Horror Story is one of the most confusing shows ever. People who are dead, are coming back alive in every episode. My guess is that is that the yard is kind of like Pet Semetary. People who get murdered there, are buried in the yard. They then come back to life and haunt the place.

Did anyone check out Once Upon a Time? It's not scary at all, but the story line is decent. I was hoping for something a little bit more gore-like but I'll take it.

GRIMM premiered on television last Friday. It's another fairy tale story based on Grimm's stories but set in the real world. The acting is shit, but the story line could get better.

Boobies.

More updates to come.

Halloween Flyer

2011-10-09T07:00:00.000-07:00

This is a flyer I made for a Halloween themed coffee house I will be performing at in a couple of weeks. I did everything from scratch.

American Horror Story Review

2011-10-06T07:17:00.000-07:00

So FX premiered its AMERICAN HORROR STORY last night and I must say, I really liked it. Aside from a few "what the fuck?" moments, it had some awesome moments.

A family of 3 moves across the country to a haunted mansion-like house in Los Angeles. The house is haunted, go figure. I'm assuming the term AMERICAN HORROR STORY may have made you think about other things like: a Oprah Winfrey sex tape, Barack Obama re-election, or even another Tyler Perry movie involving Momma (or whatever the hell his movies are about) Nope. This was an all around horror/psychological/soft core porn edited show.

So my initial thought going into this show was, "How the hell are the creators of Glee, going to frighten me?" Sure, Brad Falchuk, and Ryan Murphy were the creators of the hit tv show Nip/Tuck, but still, could they be able to pull off a horror show. Watching AHS, reminded me a lot of other horror movies. The movie instantly has a feeling of the Shining, the Others, there was even a hint of "It" in there that's not even worth mentioning but I did anyway. The "It" scene was when the old lady and the mother were drinking tea at the table. I just keep thinking of that eerie scene in "It" where Bev goes back to her old house and the old lady invites her in blahh blah blah, you get it. The beginning of the show might confuse you, it still confuses me. The story started off too fast. I understand the husband got caught cheating and then the lady attacked him with the knife and the next thing you know they're driving to Los Angeles to a new home. It kind of felt like that whole scene where the guy was caught cheating was just a psychological problem with the lady and that the scene may have been an illusion or dream. I don't know.

What I liked:

What I liked about the show was the horror movie feeling it brought to the table. There were some instances where I actually was creeped out. The opening of the show really caught my attention. I love the creepy down syndrome girl (no down syndrome hate here) cause her 4-5 lines through out the movie made me laugh but also tweak. I don't know why, but it's the crazy mentally challenged little girls who also know their shit about haunted houses. Like she fore warned the ginger kids not to go in the haunted house but they did anyway! I liked psychological aspect of the show as well. I like how the husband sees the caretaker as an attractive young woman, but the wife sees her as old an unattractive. It kind of feeds off of what they both expect. The husbands been caught cheating before, so maybe it's what he wants to see. I don't know. I also liked the fucked up teenager kid who's like semi human and semi creature. He was the one who scared that girl in the basement with the lights all flickering. The half burnt face man was a fast runner. I have a feeling we're not done seeing him yet. He seems like one of those characters who will come back and try to help out the family. His character is pretty wicked and morbid as well. I'm still trying to get a feel for the house itself. It seems like we'll learn more about it in future episodes along with the daughter who really has no purpose thus far other than being a bitch, and cutting herself. She appears at the most random times.

What I didn't like:

There were quite a few "what the fuck" moments for sure. First off, why did we have to see a guy masturbate in his room. I don't object to the maid though haha. Also, who the fuck whacks it while standing in front of a window while the creepy burnt face man watches from the laundry area of the backyard? That scene just came out of no where. As mentioned before, the show kind of started off really fast. Like it went from haunted houses, to a lady catching her husband cheating, and then they're moving. I doubt it would have made sense to slow it down a bit because if he cheated, the only thing the show would do is show scenes of their lives while dealing with the incident and that would be boring. I probably wouldn't want to continue watching the show if that happened. I don't know how I feel about the man in the black leather suit either. I see the posters for the show and it shows the pregnant mom and the man in the black leather that may or may not be the husband. All I'm saying is that this show better not stretch out into the completely weird zone. Like I don't want it to go from horror to the show Lost. I love Lost, but this is horror, not science fiction.

This show has potential. We've seen some awesome things from the first episode and I'm sure that there's more to come. These Gleetard writers have surely surprised me with the pilot. When I talked about the influence of other past horror stories and then it hit me. The title of the show explains it all. As long as the show doesn't end with a giant spider, it'll be good.

COMING SOON:
- Troll Hunter movie review
- Dr. Austins book review
- Weird NJ issue #37 review
- Cool things around NJ during October photo album.

Where I've been

2011-10-06T07:02:00.000-07:00

Well I can't say that I've been completely focused on what I love to do. The past Summer was truly a stressful time for me. Between my mother being sick, grandfather being sick (in which I volunteered to be a caretaker for), trying to graduate college, and just dealing with my diet. I also started doing stand up comedy again and have been doing some shows here and there. I have not gotten the time to watch movies, shows, read books, comics, or anything that I enjoyed doing. But let's face it, it's October and I will definitely have a lot on my plate this month. I am re-reading Dr. Austin's book. I don't know if he reads my blog but I owe that man a book review before he writes another text book haha. I also have a review on FX's American Horror Story episode 1 today (I don't professionally review them of course, I just complain or make fun). I do intend on setting up a horror movie weekend review with my friends every Saturday. I have some creepy pictures that I want to post to the site that I've been taking with my camera. Also, for anyone that is interested, I'll be reviewing the new Weird NJ magazine. I've also thought about reading the Weird series of books like: Weird NJ 1 and 2, Weird Pennsylvania, Weird Ohio, Weird NY etc...

I want to apologize to every single person who reads this blog. Even if it's 4 people, I'm sorry. Things happen and sometimes we don't have full control over it. Never dwell on the negative though. I'm here, I'm writing, and that's all that matters.

Astral Projections are INSIDIOUS

2011-07-24T19:19:00.000-07:00

INSIDIOUSSSSSSSSSSSS

Yeah I bought the movie on Blu Ray because any movie that claims to be the scariest movie since the Exorcist is making quite a bold statement. Basically what they're saying is that it's been 38 years since anyone has shit their pants while watching a horror flick and I totally disagree.

Wait, do I disagree?

So the film starts off rather slow. I mean I wasn't screaming or crying in the first 5 minutes of the movie, so that fucking movie was slow.

just kidding.

honestly.

I was easily convinced by one commercial that I wanted to see this movie. Friends had compared it to other films like the Omen, Amityville, Big... just kidding. Not BIG haha. I had liked the Amityville remake a lot and disliked the 5 hour long old version of the movie. This movie ran 97 minutes I believe but felt a bit longer than that.

Upon the opening 10 minutes I kind of had an idea of where this movie was going. Guessing from the cover, the kid was some kind of demon retard with an obsession for Cocoa Puffs. I was dead wrong actually. Long story short, the kid is an astral projector (which is different from nocturnal emissions). This means he leaves his body while he sleeps. The child named Dalton goes a bit too far when he astral projects and enters a dark realm where evil spirits try to possess his body. Since astral projection and outer body experiences are documented by Wikipedia as a real thing, I thought this was a cool concept for a movie.

This movie had its ups and downs. I personally thought there were enough creative ideas that could have turned this movie into something really scary. It seemed like writer and James Wan focused more on the jump scenes than the actual material revolving around the story line.

The make up and design of the dead and creature like people were awesome. The main evil hooved guy kind of reminded me of Darth Maul from the Star Wars movies. I liked the old lady who was apart of Dalton's fathers childhood. You'll see more. The design of everything was perfect.

I don't feel as if the scenes flowed well together. In the beginning it seemed like things just jumped to quickly. When Dalton goes to the hospital I think they said it's been a week since he was in a coma. I think they should have added some haunted scenarios during that week while he was away. I don't know, just my opinion.

I think the music and sounds were awesome in this movie. The music on the record player where the lady sings about tulips and the little boy dancing inside the house really creeped me out. It's on Youtube, it's quite funny and eerie.

The ending was pretty cool. The psychic lady definitely went ape shit on Dalton's father.

So should you see this movie? I don't know what to think of it. It's still running through my mind. I haven't really given a horror movie a chance in a while and this movie was pretty decent. It wasn't perfect. I made a lot of funny comments during the movie cause there were just things you couldn't help but laugh at. Definitely give it a shot.

I'm an idiot. You knew this. How's life?

2011-06-24T12:45:00.000-07:00

Excuse my last post that I deleted because I thought it was the new Amity movie trailer, but it was just a bunch of clips put together and taped from a camera phone. This camera phone made it looking like it was being taped from a movie theater. The footage was actually part of the Haunting in Connecticut movie (which I never ever ever ever gave two shits about seeing) and yeah...

I fell for a fucking Youtube video...

I'll carry on.

So I've been busy still. I've been helping my mother take care of my Grandfather who's been in and out of the hospital. Between that, school, doctors, dieting, friends, life, I haven't been able to catch up on this site. I haven't watched any horror movies, played any games or even caught up on any kind of horror news. I did however purchase the recent SciFi Now magazine to read about the upcoming Season 2 of the Walking Dead. I'm kind of excited for it but at the same time as a fan of the comics it just seems like the storyline of that show is going to go by so slow.

but I'm patient.

Currently did read Vol. 14 of the Walking Dead last night and I must say I'm quite shocked but happy. It's a slow moving volume but it's action packed by far.

umm...

So I had a comment on the post from April by a man named Doctor Austin. He is sending me a book to do a review on and I can't wait. My lack of attendance on this is terrible and I didn't see Doctor Austins comment until today which was posted 2 months ago.

So I went out and bought $3600 of filming equipment this past week. Decided that if I'm not going to film school then I'm going to school myself with filming equipment... does that make sense? I wanted to do something with film, writing, and I know I have the ability to do on my own without any kind of restraints. I bought a Canon Rebel T3i/600D SLR camera. I had gotten a student discount on Adobe Creative Suite 5.5 Production Premium that has Photoshop, Premiere, After Effects and a bunch of other Adobe programs. Then I bought a Macbook pro for strictly editing, and whatever else that's filming related. I still have to warm up and learn how to use all the Adobe programs the right way and then I'll be on my way to making independent movies, skits, band promos, etc... I do plan on making a zombie movie. That's going to be down the road some time and it's more of a reality now than it's ever been thanks to the quality of equipment I have and Adobe After Effects which can really spiffy up my films.

Also, I'm going to be adding photos in this blog of creepy things I find on the way to places in New Jersey. I know on the way to Atlantic City there are a lot of old creepy haunted looking places when we drive through town. Absecon, NJ alone is full of old watch port houses from the early 1900's. It's creepy but cool. I'll be going to random Weird NJ places as well. For those of you who don't know what Weird NJ is, it's a magazine that's put out every October and May that consists of any and everything weird in NJ. Whether it be haunted, UFO's, weird people, weird habits, etc... it's all there. The guys Mark and Mark had/have a show called Weird Travels where they do the same exact thing they do in NJ but all over the United States.

Expect videos and awesome pics soon!

Amityville Horror: The Lost Tapes TRAILER!!!

2011-05-24T07:41:00.000-07:00

Found this on Youtube! Can't wait!!!!!!!!!

Call of the DEAD!!!

2011-04-27T09:41:00.000-07:00

CHECK THIS OUT!!

That's going to flipping awesome!!! Trejo! Rooker! FREDDY KRUEGER!!! sarah michelle geller (eh), AND GEORGE A. ROMERO

please folks, if you have Call of Duty Black Ops for XBOX 360, add my gamertag so we can destroy zombies all day long!!! GT: x arty mcfly x

The Crow ReMaKe

2011-04-15T08:27:00.000-07:00

Read this article about The Crow remake with Bradley Cooper first.

I don't know how I feel about a Crow remake. The original Crow is almost like a masterpiece in it's own way. I was a fan of City of Angels as well because I loved the first one so much and I love the Deftones (the band playing the concert in the movie). This is a remake that I wouldn't mind being remade as long as it's done right. As far as Bradley Cooper goes, it's 50/50. I always remember him as the douche bag in The Wedding Crashers. I wasn't a fan of the Hangover at all. I haven't seen anything else with him in it.

As far as it being done right I'd like to see a dark city like the Crow had. I of course don't want any insane graphics or CGI done to the movie cause that would definitely ruin it. I mean the imagery is going to be a lot better than the 90's film, but don't make it computer animated. AND ABSOLUTELY NO 3D!!!!!!!

Bradley Cooper would not be my number one choice, I haven't really thought about that yet. He just doesn't have the dark hair, the dark attitude, or any kind of characteristic that Brandon Lee had. Obviously they'll fix his looks, and he can work on the character. As I sit here and think about actors who could or could have been a good Eric Draven, I think Heath Ledger could have made for a good Eric Draven. Hmm, who else... Maybe the dude who played Prince Caspian on the Narnia movies? I think his name is Ben something. I don't know! If Bradley Cooper is the man, then I hope he does it RIGHT!

Another key element that made the Crow experience whole was the soundtrack. The first two movies had awesome soundtracks to them. The Crow had Pantera, Rage Against the Machine, Rollins Band, The Cure, and others. City of Angels had the better soundtrack with Hole and their version of Fleetwood Mac's "Gold Dust Woman". They had the Deftones, White Zombie, Filter, Korn, Toadies, Iggy Pop and so many more artists.

Just another case in the world of remakes that didn't really need to be done.

I'm well aware I talk WAY too much about movie remakes haha.

The Horror Movie Industry is DEAD!!!

2011-04-10T18:38:00.000-07:00

Just a year over this blog and now at the 50th postiversity...anniversablog...

...well it's the 50th post... so pop a bottle of champagne for this uneventful event and listen to me rant about today's Best Buy trip.

The horror movie industry is dead. Why do I say this? En route to Best Buy today, I had such a craving for horror movies that I decided that I was going to pick up some cheap horror flicks and fulfill my craving with some awesomeness. Good or bad, I just needed some horror. Now Best Buy recently has been going through some movie changes. With blu ray movies becoming cheaper and more affordable, Best Buy felt they needed to cater to the blu ray craze. With more aisles of blu ray movies that are not categorized by genre, only alphabetically, the dvd aisles are lessening each year. Don't get me wrong, I have about 75 blu ray myself, but there are not many horror movies released on blu ray. As I entered the horror section (which used to have it's own aisle and a half) I came to a section that was 1/4 of the whole aisle. It was labeled horror. I thought to myself, "Has Best Buy given up on today's horror movie collection?". I was kind of annoyed that the horror DVD section had been smaller than the anime and the WWE wrestling section. I was just in shock. Again I found the JAWS movies in Action. That's just a long time battle that I'm never going to win.

So what happened? Is America losing hope in horror? If you ask me, I think people are so gung ho on all of these shit hole comedy movies like The Hangover and any 20 million other Seth Rogen and Zack Galifigienoogoo guy in. Not to mentioned the Katherine Heigl movie infestation seen here.

It's just funny how all these comedies and romantic movies are all becoming the staple of the film industry. They're just repeating movie plots and adding mini twists and actors and actresses. It seems like the only thing horror movies are doing today are re-makes of old movies or re-makes of asian horror movies. There's nothing to show for the industry. Much respect to these b class horror producers that are trying to make a name for themselves. I have a lot of respect for the Monsters of Horror, and Horrorfest people and all of those horror film makers. No ones getting recognition and it's a fucking shame.

side note: if anyone has ever gone to Tom Savini's make up school, message me somehow!

As I looked through the collection of horror movies they were all over priced, and the selection was just terrible. There was an overstock of the movie DEVIL by M Night Shia Labeof haha. They had too many The Strangers DVD's as well. Oh and too many Piranha films. I found a $13 4 movie collection of Critters 1, 2, 3, and 4 that I bought, other than that, the movies were bad. I remember going there just last year and seeing all kinds of Evil Dead the book of the dead cases. I remember seeing all kinds of cool box sets for Hellraiser, the Return of the Living Dead series. I remember the Freddy and Jason boxed sets. All of this DVD goodness is just lost in some Best Buy factory now. Amazon.com is probably the best place to find cheap and rare horror DVD's and blu ray's. I made a wish list of all of the horror movies that I still need to add to my collection. I'm afraid if I add any DVD's that they'll be on blu ray sooner than later.

MOVIES I THINK THAT NEED TO BE ON BLU RAY NOW!!!

Jaws
Jurrassic Park
From Dusk Til Dawn (May 3rd, 2011)
Legend(non-horror May 31st, 2011)
Ghostbusters 2

and every other 80's classic horror movie.

Well that's it for now. I'm becoming part of the Youtube community and starting up a movie, music, blu ray, dvd, video game, media, awesomeness channel. I doubt anyone will watch, but I get bored just writing sometimes.

Almost a month later...

2011-03-24T17:28:00.000-07:00

I'm starting to suck at posting shit. Right now I should be doing my homework but I've found other useful things to talk about.

Fact or Faked

So I've been watching this show on the Scifi channel... oops I mean SyFy channel. I remember seeing this show a while back possibly. I remember something about them trying to find Bigfoot and then trying to recreate footage that was taken a decade back. Most of the episodes I have seen include the group of people debunking these things with little experiments. Retarded experiments might I had.

The Bigfoot footage was debunked by simply dressing one of the crew members in a gorilla suit and letting him run the same route as bigfoot did in the footage. Same place, same path. The runner ran as fast as bigfoot did. This debunked the Bigfoot case. That's it? Really? I don't believe in Bigfoot myself but c'mon, how does that prove anything? Cause you run as fast as Bigfoot means that it was fake?

Then there's this video of a black looking witch type figure flying over hills in Mexico. They tried zip lines, jet packs, string on a bag of balloons and finally they took the motor from a flying toy helicopter and attached the string to the balloons and that is how they debunked the figure. Some random resident lady knew how to take apart a toy helicopter and create the same thing they did? Stupid! I don't believe the tape was real, but again these idiots think they're debunking something when they're not.

I love how the one episode the guy swears he seen an alien rip his dogs face apart in the woods where he was hunting. He then staged a tape of where he beat the fake alien in the back of the head and made it bleed. He made another video tape of bringing the alien back to his home and I guess gave it an autopsy while it was still alive. They debunked this by recreating the alien and it's ship out of hollywood items (cause you and I both know that kind of stuff is available all over the world for every day people to buy). Again, I don't believe in aliens but the way they debunked this is by using some type of voice radar machine that tells if people are lying or not. Obviously it was something created from the show to prove these things wrong.

Anyone ever hear of CGI? or video editing equipment? Regardless I still watch the show to see some of the ridiculous things they come up with.

ZOMBIES!!!

So one of these days I'm gonna get to kill some zombies with the dudes from "You've Got Dead on You". If you're reading this then I'm sure you know who those guys are and you love love love love love love them! I do, but they'd probably hate me if I told them I'm about 10-11 episodes behind them. I can't find my iPod which means I haven't been able to listen to them during my daily routines. No excuses! It's just hard to carry around a laptop and do something else at the same time! Recently they've been posting Youtube videos of Left 4 Dead sessions. You can go here http://www.youtube.com/LockeLacke y and watch all of Jason Hall's video game awesomeness! Check out Jay and Craigs Left 4 Dead sessions first though. Hopefully my Left 4 Dead session will be taped so I can show how truly unreliable I am at keeping my team safe!

Where have I been?

With my lack of site updates and all I feel really bad. I've been on a diet, been seeing a nutritionist, surgeon, and a personal trainer. I've been busy with school, helping my mom out, and all other things. I've just been a busy person. I've been currently beating older Resident Evil games for the PS2 (RE:4, Outbreak, Code Veronica). I've been reading this NIGHT of the LIVING DEAD graphic novel and it's pretty awesome. I've been on a old school wrestling tirade and it's just never ending! But I will be back with more to offer I promise!

Paranormal Activity 2 Review... FINALLY!!!

2011-02-27T20:20:00.001-08:00

YOU SUCK!

Seriously? This movie was more annoying than Gilbert Gottfried singing the National Anthem in Spanish while running around in circles.

The highlight of this movie was the basic mediocre parts of the first film. If I wanted to watch a bunch of people's lives through security cameras I'd become a security guard at A & P. Every time they would show the cameras in the hours of "Dead Time" nothing happened for the first 30 days. Soo fucking lame. I hated it. It made the first movie go from okay to awesome. I do like the connection between the two. I thought that was quite clever. Other than that I didn't like it. Slow moving, typical sound scaring, retarded horror movie.

The parts that were cool was when the dog gets dragged into the room haha. I thought that was funny. The kitchen scene where every thing opens up at once was cool too.

Every time they showed the sidewalk security camera I hoped something cool would happen. Maybe like a munchkin from the Lollipop Guild would go skipping through or something.

What was the fathers deal in the movie? He just didn't believe everything. He blamed everything on the fucking wind right?

Daughter: Dad the door shut by itself

Dad: It was the wind!

Daughter: Dad the pans fell from the ceiling.

Dad: It was the wind!

Daughter: The baby just slid out of his crib by an unseeable force and dragged down the stairs to the basement with no logical explanation.

Dad: It was the wind!

Lastly, the hot chick with the big boobs from the first one somehow walked all the way to their house, in her underwear and tank top, with blood on her shirt, and no one noticed this. That is so awesome.

This movie sucks. They're coming out with a 3rd now. That one's probably going to fucking blow too. Don't waste your time.

DON'T WASTE YOUR TIME!!!!!!!!

Resident Evil AFTERLIFE

2011-02-15T18:13:00.000-08:00

So this movie sucked. Didn't expect much from it. I just needed something to watch while I ate my chicken stir fry and won ton soup.

I thought the first movie sucked.

The second movie was cool I think.

Then the 3rd movie wasn't terrible... but it kind of blew.

Then there's this movie. I just hate how they tried to mix in the Matrix with a zombie movie. Assholes.

I hated the Matrix btw.

It seems like they make Milla Jovavich's character completely unstoppable. She always defies odds, and manages to escape EVERYTHING. So annoying.

Didn't watch Piranha yet.
Didn't watch Paranormal Activity 2 yet.

I have been super busy.

The Rite, right? Am I right? Rite... Right.. well the movie looks good!

2011-01-28T21:46:00.000-08:00

The Rite!

That movie actually looks pretty damn good. I keep seeing previews for it and I think for the first time in a VERY long time I'm going to see a movie in theaters. The last movie I went to see at a movie theater was Zombieland. So yeah, it's been quite a while.

Judging by the previews they director/writer/producer/whoever, is trying to capture the aura of the Exorcist. I'm pretty sure if you've seen the trailer then you've already gathered that. It also kind of reminds me of the movie Stigmata, which I absolutely loved but still gets to me.

The movie is based on true events. It's based on the book The Making of a Modern Exorcist by Matt Baglio (thank you Wikipedia).

I like movies that deal with things like demons, and exorcisms. I guess it's the reality of the movie is what keeps me interested. Anthony Hopkins as we all know is a phenomenal actor (you'd know this if you've seen any movies with Hannibal Lector). It should be a good movie, I'm hoping to catch it Monday or Tuesday night when I have time.

Don't know if I mentioned this but I picked up The Last Exorcism but haven't watched it yet. I also just picked up the Piranha blu ray cause I'm an idiot. I've been wanting to see the Village as well. I just haven't had time to do anything lately. January has been a busy month for me so far. So much going on and I know my very few readers probably think I quit doing the blog. I'm currently starting up a Youtube page and doing review videos (cause we all know how original that is). I would review movies, comics, music, and video games. Another thing on my to do list.
I know I said I was going to post a million other things but I just haven't gotten to them. If it's important I'll post it haha.

New blogs in the coming days, I promise.

Shock and Fucking Terror

2011-01-08T12:54:00.000-08:00

I'm about to waste more of your time.

I'm writing yet ANOTHER movie script. This genre is horror. My plan is to finish more than 3 pages with this. It would be a personal record of mine actually. I'm tired not finishing projects. I don't know what it's gonna be about, but I know there won't be vampires in it. There probably won't even be zombies in it. I want to take 5 categories of horror films that I love and mash them up all into one. Of course I'll make my own plot and story, I just want to use some kind of substance from them. I'm hoping someone would read it when I'm half way done and give me some tips. This time I'm going to brainstorm this out for at least 2 months before I even lay a finger the keyboard and start my rough draft.

The movies that will inspire my writing... hmm.

1. Stigmata/The Exorcism of Emily Rose/The Exorcist: Exorcism movies are awesome. It's something that has actually happened in the world. Whether people believe in this or not, it's documented by the Vatican. The realism of exorcisms have always creeped me out since I was young. From the movies I mentioned, to watching episodes of exorcisms on Unsolved Mysteries, all of this must be incorporated.

2. IT/Killer Klowns From Outer Space: Fucking clowns! These things are fucking evil! I don't care if they give you balloons and want to be your friend! They are the devil. It was always a great movie to the very ending with the stupid spider thing. Killer Klowns is a classic and they always freaked me out. I'm not including anything clowns from space, just clowns in general. Another thing from my child hood I hated. I remember when family members had clowns at my cousins birthday parties, it was never a happy time for me. Instead I spent my time plotting an strategy incase the clown turns on us and tries to kill everyone. Wiffle ball bats, plastic forks and knifes, and a basketball were my weapons of choice then. I remember seeing clowns at Six Flags Great Adventure's Fright Fest. I hated those shits. So it's important to add clowns.

3. Friday the 13th/Nightmare on Elm Street/Halloween: Of course these have to play a part. They are the core of horror movies. Whenever you walk alone in the dark and hear any kind of noise, you immediately think it's one of these 3 guys. No matter how fast you run, no matter how far you run, these guys travel fast. Freddy is already implanted in your dreams so you better be drinking caffeine while you're running.

4. Evil Dead/Evil Dead 2/Army of Darkness/My Name is Bruce/Zombieland: In my script I'm going to need that one so called hero. Now Ash wasn't a hero until Army of Darkness if you ask me, but he was the bad ass good guy. I'd like to have someone with the same attitude and awesomeness as Ash without the character being Ash. I don't want this script/movie to have some kind of teenage emo looking kid who waves his fucking wand and eliminates the demon. I want this to be a bad ass character kind of like Tallahassee in Zombieland. A ruthless, dirty mouth, ass kicking mother fucker... There will also be a group of some kind of ass kicking bandits along with this character.

5. JAWS/JAWS 2: I don't really know how to place Jaws in the mix. Jaws just scared me as a kid. The shock and terror that it brought to millions of people is well worth the addiction.

So we have the realistic movie with the exorcism and such. We have evil clowns. There's the mass murderers of the 80's, 90's, 2000's, and today (in which is the fear that the terror is always right behind you). We have the bad ass potential hero and the one who will fight the terror and evil clowns (if I choose to use clowns). And then there's the shock and terror like Jaws gave. Some thing new and dangerous.

Ok, I'm gonna be honest here. I suck at writing things. This is something I'm truly going to give my all. Something I will not hurry up with for the simple fact that I want it to be perfect. The more time spent on it, the better it can become.

As far as zombie movies? I'm not even going to try to step in Master Romero's shoes.

Mean Gein

2011-01-02T14:04:00.001-08:00

One of the craziest bastards I've ever read about is a man by the name of Ed Gein. If you've seen movies like, "Silence of the Lambs", "Psycho", and "The Texas Chainsaw Massacre" then you'd have an idea of where I might be going with this.

Ed Gein, also know as the, "Butcher of Plainfield" was one the worlds most sickest, demented, calm, fucked up murderers ever. In the book, "Deviant" by Harold Scheckter he tells about the early life of Gein and his family. Ed Gein had this droop over his one eye in which kids made fun of him for it. His mother was a strong Christian woman who was pretty much the blood flow of their family. The father was a lazy POS and he did have a brother but I don't remember much about him.

Gein's mother never let him hangout with girls or have friends so he was really sheltered. His only source of entertainment and fun was reading comic books. These comic books were full of Native American and Nazi's and cannibalism. Of course this is something that sparked Ed Gein's sick future but I also think the mother had a lot to do with that as well.

Gein was obsessed with collecting female body parts. He would collect vaginas, lips, scalps, and he would salt them to preserve them. He Killed larger women and he dug his mothers grave and brought her back to his house and stored her in her original room that was sealed shut and kept clean like the way she had it. This was apparently Gein's plan all along.

Gein also killed his brother. It's not a definite thing but it was something that pointed in his direction even though no one prosecuted him for it. I know that he set these woods on fire and guided his brother through them. When the police came Gein led them right to where his brother died. That kind of made the cops a little suspicious that Ed couldn't find his brother but yet he brought them right to the spot of his body. The cops also noted that Ed's brother had bumps and bruises on his forehead from a rock. There was no way he could've fallen and done that to himself.

One that's really striking about Ed Gein is that he was a calm man. People didn't expect anything like this from him. They said he was nice and quiet. When he was in jail he admitted everything without hesitation. He seemed like a normal man and acted like all was well. Maybe in his head he didn't feel as if he was doing something wrong? It's craziness.

The book "Deviant" is a definite must read. I might have been off with a few things here and there. It's probably one of the best books I've ever read. Also the most fucked up. The book is 100% true and I had to do a lot of research cause some of the things I couldn't believe.

Things like this strike me. I always wondered what things go on inside of a persons head when they want to mutilate someone. As sick and twisted as people like Gein might be, they're definitely interesting individuals.

Go onto Amazon right now and purchase this book!

Merry Christmas 2010

2010-12-25T08:31:00.000-08:00

Wishing all of my awesome readers a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. I got some pretty awesome gifts from my mom. I'm 25 and still get things under my tree haha. Not as much of course but it's still something I look forward to.

I hope all of you zombie horror fans out there have a great holiday. I wish you all a safe and Happy Christmas.

Freddy VS. Jason VS. Ash and other Comics

2010-12-13T20:08:00.000-08:00

I guess I've fallen into a graphic novel phase pit and I can't get out of it! I've been reading tons and tons of graphic novels lately. It was something I've always had an interest in but no one else I hung out with liked comics.

I've been reading: The Walking Dead, Freddy vs. Jason vs. Ash, Locke and Key, Scott Pilgrim, N. by Stephen King, Incognito, Preacher, and Chew.

The book I loved loved loved loved was Freddy vs. Jason vs. Ash ::FvJvA::. It was like they took the nonsense from the Freddy vs. Jason movie, wrote a comic sequel to it and made it fucking amazing. See I liked the FvJ, but I still bash it anyway. Adding Ash to the story line was so fucking cool. Pretty much the town where all of Jasons murders occured started to build up the town to forget about all of the Jason events that happened. They just so happened to build an S Mart where Ash works at in Michigan? Minnesota? I forget. But he comes down there and he has to find the book of the dead before Freddy gets it and uses it (which he does). The comic has a lot of great dialogue that really makes Ash and Freddy's characters come alive. I can't recommend this book enough. It's out of print, I found mine at Jay and Silent Bob's Secret Stash for $20 but I'm sure you can find it on Amazon or Ebay.

The one day I was at Barnes and Noble and I came across Book 2 of FvJvA called Dream Warriors. I thought it was the sequel to FvJ and I was about to read it. Then a few days later going up to the Secret Stash and found the original. That was a great day. I'll probably read the second one in the next few days.

Preacher is another good read. It's about a preacher who gets possessed by Genesis which is an angel/demon. It was created when a demon and angel fucked. It took Preacher himself and possessed him and now the Saint of Murder is out to kill him along with a lot of other people. It's pretty twisted.

The Walking Dead is self explanatory.

Locke and Key I haven't started yet but I've been wanting to read it.

CHEW is awesome, it's about a cibopath (someone who can get psychic reads by eating something). This means he's spent working and eating flesh to get stories. It's a great read.

Scott Pilgrims kind of dorky and lame but it's not terrible.

N. by Stephen King is sick! It's really one of those stories that make you thing. The artwork is phenomenal in it as well.

Incognito was just a typical hero villain story. This is where the bad guy turns out good.

So yeah, nothing interesting to talk about. I have a lot more things on the way.

Thoughts on AMC's The Walking Dead

2010-12-13T19:58:00.001-08:00

I don't want to make this a long blog so I'll keep it short haha.

I thought the first two episodes (possibly 3) were good. I really loved the scene where Rick sees his family, and they realized he wasn't dead.

The other scene that was awesome was when the black guy was popping heads with the rifle after Rick left for Atlanta. They followed the book pretty well until then.

Now following the book is, let's face it, impossible. The comics skip seasons with the turn of the page as to where the show takes it day by day. I think the comics had a little bit more gore, and of course less cursing. Merle Dixon did drop the N word, but that's not considered a curse.

I don't know how I feel about the ending. Season 2 could go a lot of places. I don't think it was smart giving the first season just 6 episodes. I think they tried to cram somethings but at the same time it was lacking.

SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!SPOILER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!SPOILER!!

WHY THE FUCK IS SHANE STILL ALIVE?!?!?!

SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!SPOILER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!SPOILER!!

Whoa I added color to my page. I guess I'd give it 3.5 brains out of 5. I love zombie stuff, and all of the survival strategizing. This show had potential. I hope the 2nd season is better.

Maybe it was the acting??!?!?!?

I'm writing another blog.

December to Dismember

2010-12-07T07:20:00.000-08:00

Wow no posts in December?!?! I've been lacking in any kind of news and I apologize. I've just been extremely busy with the holiday season coming up. I'm probably one of the worst Christmas shoppers in the world. I never know what to get anyone. This year I started earlier than normally... by like a day or two haha. I guess I just want to be clever about it and not disappoint people.

ANYWAYS! I'd like to address the post I put up on my Zombie Digest Blog status the other day. It was a Chuck Klosterman piece for the New York Times about zombies, pop culture, and his brilliant mind and how he uses it. I've read parts of Klosterman's, "Sex Drugs and Cocoa Puffs". It was funny at parts, and I wish were able to finish it. I don't know where the book is haha.

SURE THING.

I gotta finish the article too . I was half asleep when I saw it so. That'll be for another post.

So after 9-10 years, I finally watched the first Lord of the Rings. It was on Netflix and I was absolutely bored so I started to watch it. I know it's not horror movie related, but I have to say that the orcs in that movie were pretty bad ass looking. It wasn't CGI and whoever did the make up effects on them made them creepy as hell. Overall the movie was better than what I had expected. Frodo is a little bitch by the way. He was given sword and still got his ass kicked. Aragorn and Gimli were cool though.

I have some posts coming up. I'll get to them eventually.

Some things that I'm posting soon:

- The Walking Dead Season Finale/Future.

- Slashumentary I found on Netflix review.

- Graphic novel N. by Stephen King review.

- Cool shit for Christmas.

- You've Got Dead on You awesomeness.

And I'm sure I'll find other shit to talk about and bore you all.

Is Harry Potter a horror movie yet? No? Oh well, too bad!

2010-11-21T23:07:00.001-08:00

Yes that's a serious question!

Deathly Hallows definitely sounds like it could have something horror ish, to it, right? I didn't read the books although I wanted to. I was too busy doing important things like beating every Silent Hill game or Resident Evil game known to man. Resident Evil 1, 2 and 5 are the only ones I ever finished haha.

What gets me is that the movie Twilight shares the horror section with many other classics at any place that sells DVD's. Horror? Twilight? NO! I've complained about this before and it just annoys me! Like when I found all the JAWS movies in the action section at Best Buy and had a 3 minute argument with an employee who apparently took his half ass stock boy job of perfecting the genre of movies way too seriously. Jaws isn't an action movie you shit head. There's really only one action packed scene. Quint goes down in Jaws' is mouth, Brody stuffs Jaws' mouth with scuba tank, Brody shoots scuba tank, shark goes KABOOM, and chunks of shark meat sink to the bottom of the ocean.

btw... jobs at Best Buy are cool, but you suck if you can't label movies!

Is anyone interested in ghosts? I'm starting a ghost rant.

All my life I've been fascinated with the paranormal. I know the term "paranormal" stretches for miles in meanings but the meaning for me would just be ghosts. A lot of times people see things that are unexplainable and assume that it could have been a ghost, or something else. I know there's skeptics out there who just don't believe in anything like that. If they seen something that was completely unexplainable they'd think of a million different things before they'd say it was a ghost. Maybe because 99% of the things they were thinking of have been proven to be real? Whatever, I believe in ghosts and over the years I've had my fair share of unexplainable happenings.

I'd like to share some with you.

...this is where you'll probably stop reading haha.

-When I was young, around 8 or 9 years old I had always sensed something in my house. I know that a few yards back behind my house they had found a dead body from the town of Newark. They even named the hill, Dead Mans Hill. When I would wake up like early in the mornings I always looked out my back window to see if it was raining, snowing, sunshine, etc... There were times where I would see a black figure walking. Maybe it was because I had just woken up and my eyes weren't fully functioning, I dunno. BUT, there were also times where I'd be watching television downstairs and all of a sudden hear typing on my computer. The back room is the furthest place towards the backyard where I had seen the figure. There were often times where the printer would go off by itself too. The weird thing was is that nothing was even turned on. Back in the day we had one of these boards where you connected the the printer, monitor, mother board, and anything else in that area to it so all you had to do was hit one button to power everything up.

-My family and I have a tradition? every year where we go camping in Virginia. I did this the first 18 years of my life. We all stopped going after my grandmother passed away, but our last year there, we saw something we still talk about to this day. About 8 years ago we were in Virginia at a campground called Cherrystone. The whole area surrounding this campground wasn't a packed area. It was really low income housing, there were maybe few neighborhoods and a little town with a lawn shop, pharmacy, restaurant, and a food store. I guess you could say it was a poor town. The campsite itself looked way nicer. The people in the surrounding towns were so generous. Some of the nicest people I'd ever meet. It's not like arrogant pricks in Jersey, these Virginian people had manners, and treated you with respect and kindness. We would always take rides down the back roads of the Cheriton town. There were a lot of old creepy looking buildings and schools that were just abandoned. The one day we drove down the back road. This was a longggggg road. We ended up on this court which made it easier to turn around. There were these really old houses. They all had watch towers in them but they looked like they had been painted up nicely to look new. I'm guessing since it was by the Chesapeake Bay, that it was probably a port for the people that lived there at one time. We were leaving the court street thingy and we saw an old lady in her backyard watering flowers. She was just standing there, and she looked pretty strange. She had grey skin and it honest to God looked like she didn't have eyes. Maybe they were small and squinty, I dunno. But we all looked at each other for a split second and when we looked back, she was gone. She literally vanished into nothing. There were no doors close enough for her to fly into like speedy Gonzalez. That was one of the eeriest things I had ever seen. Also down the road from that place is an abandoned school where kids were murdered over racism. Happened in the 60's I believed.

Weird things! But I believe in what I saw.

I'm making a horror movie called Purehell. It's about a hand sanitizer that's going to turn people into zombies. Get it? Purell, Purehell? No? That's kind of retarded, I know.

I just bought the Undead Nightmare download for the Red Dead Redemption Xbox 360 game and it's quite awesome! It is a zombie game, and it's pretty much Grand Theft Auto in midwestern times, with a zombie outbreak. If only they could do GTA V as a zombie apocalypse in New York. Imagine that? The weapons cheat + car cheat + missions + hordes and hordes of zombies + the amount of free time I'll force my self to have to play this kind of game = boring life... YESSSSSSSSSSSS I RULE!!!

I had more to write but I think I'll save that for Wednesday or Thursday for my Spectacular Turkey Thanksgiving Survival Rundown. I'll give you a full serving of 4 different survival tips around thanksgiving...

who the hell am I to be giving people tips about ANYTHING?!?!?!?!

enjoy and keep surviving.

This shit is shorter than Gary Coleman

2010-11-09T17:09:00.000-08:00

Is there anything I really want to talk about?

Just spent 3 awesome, funtacular, expensive days in Atlantic City. As I was sitting at the Black Jack table I glanced at the cashier section, then I looked at my surroundings... it was then I realized that this casino is full of living, non flesh eating, normal human beings. I was temped to pick up a chair and use it was a weapon. I walked around every slot machine to see if there was a bunch of $100 bills on the ground. There were no swords or guitars on the walls. Plenty of booze though.

And that is how you know I've played Dead Rising 2, too much.

So hopefully everyone has been watching the AMC series, "The Walking Dead". I'm madly in love. Everything about this show captures the beginning volumes of the comic book series. I just got done watching episode 2 and I was a bit confused. In the scene where Rick and Glenn cover themselves in blood, guts, flesh, limbs, etc... I didn't know that was in the beginning. I thought that was later on in the story where Glenn and Rick realize that they were running low on ammo so they went into town. I guess the TV show is trying to cram certain things into one episode but yet they're taking more than two episodes to for Rick to find Lori and Carl. Who cares, right? The show is fucking awesome and I love it. They're releasing Vol. 13 the day before Thanksgiving. I hate waiting!

I tried getting room 1408 in the hotel room and the front desk lady acted all retarded when I told her my reason.

ME: There's a movie based on a Stephen King short story called 1408 where people go into the room and end up killing themselves... no one ever makes it out alive.

Front Desk Wench: Ummm... okay... wellllllll that room is taken. I apologize for your personal requests not being met. There is a 14008, but that will not be ready until around 3 pm... I don't know if it's suicide free.

ME: Just give me the fastest room in the Marina tower.

bastards.

Happy Halloween

2010-10-29T07:56:00.001-07:00

HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!!

Ok so this Halloween morning I have the Ewok Celebration song stuck in my head from Return of the Jedi. Some video on youtube that some guy made a new song for it... I dunno.

So it's Halloween! I thought about how awesome today could be, cause it definitely can't be as bad as last years Halloween. Last year at around 11 am, a tree fell and struck our front porch and completely totaled it. We didn't really care and figured we'd call someone that coming Monday to take a look at it, but our neighbors thought differently and made some calls. In a matter of minutes the fire department and police were at our house and screaming for everyone to get out. We took our time haha. The tree actually knocked down electrical wires and they were swinging and hanging near trees. We were in a hotel for a few days and all. Definitely a scary moment.

Every single year there's one costume that EVERYONE has. For the longest time period of time there was a HUGE amount of people dressing up as Spiderman. It just wasn't the kids either. I seen parents, grandparents, dogs, gerbils, guinea pigs, high school kids, and all dressed up as Spidey. Thankfully that whole charade has ended. A lot of kids like to dress up as the Dark Knight or something from Pokemon (still). Hell If I could go as Bulbasaur or Squirtle I would but I definitely don't think they make those costumes in my size.

This year I think were gonna see a lot of Avatards trick or treating. A big cloud of people in blue-ish suits. This is a good and bad thing. It's bad because it's probably the only costume I'll see (slow trick or treating area) but it's good cause now I get to hand out candy in 3D!!! I got my goggles ready to go! Hopefully it's the last year we see anyone dressed as that dumb bastard from SAW. What's his name? Candy Cane? Oh no wait, that's from Joy Ride... fuck, I can't think of his name... Oh and I hope no one goes as the Dark Knight Joker. That got out of hand the past few years.

(GOOGLES NAME)

Go figure, it's Jigsaw!

One costume that's pretty cool is the Ghostbusters costume. I see a lot of people being Ghostbusters and they have their blow up proton pack with the gun. That's a really cool costume except I wish they had a more plastic toy like proton pack instead of a pool float like thing.

Last but not least lets talk about the candy and all that is sweet! I will say this to those who still trick or treat or have kids they take trick or treating... It's an absolute myth to go trick or treating in rich neighborhoods. They give out the crappiest candy and they don't give out any money haha. I tried with my friends when I was younger every halloween. Stick to your neighborhoods and the people you know.

Shit I forgot to see if my house was egged!

Well I hope everyone has a safe and happy Halloween. Cause after today hits november and it's the countdown to Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Years, and for me my Mom's birthday on January 9th. Money is crucial right now haha. I'm still going to Atlantic City next weekend though.

Happy Halloween!

Last Time I'll Ever Talk About this Movie, I Promise!

2010-10-21T07:30:00.000-07:00

Ok so this is the last time I will ever talk about "Night of the Demons". As I've said many times before, that the remake was coming out, it had Shannon Elizabeth, Edward Furlong, and the main character chick from Freddy vs. Jason. I don't really care to Google her name right now, but I'm sure if you really wanted to know, you'd find out on your own haha.

See I'm open to a lot of things, especially remakes. Hell, I just gave the remake of Nightmare on Elm Street a decent review when most people probably hated it.

With "Night of the Demons" it's hard to put down and criticize it especially with all the thingamabobbers that come along with it. (I'm trying to be professional here with my writing and I'm failing miserably haha). Everything in the new movie is a 110% upgrade from the original. I think that's expected especially since it's been a little bit less than 20 years since the first one was made.

THE ACTING: The acting is better, and that's not saying much. Even with Edward Furlong, Monica Keena (that's her name!), and well...Shannon Elizabeth (who was only a good actress when she played a foreign exchange student and showed her boobs) the acting is still mediocre. Edward Furlong seems like he plays himself in this movie. Monica Keena does a pretty good job, and Shannon Elizabeth does a pretty good job of being the hostess, drunk, slutty, hooking up with girls, evil Angela part. The female actresses weren't that great and the actors were decent. Eh, didn't help the movie.

THE CHARACTERS: They did a good job with the characters. I believe there was a cameo with the original lipstick tit lady who wore the doo wop dress in the original. It's in the beginning when the kids are trick or treating. I was mad they didn't have the fat obnoxious guy with the bad quotes.

THE MAKE UP: Amazing work with the make up and design on the demons. They gave me the fucking willies haha. They made Angela look like Maurice from Little Monsters with a white face haha. HORNS AND ALL. Thankfully they didn't use CGI unless they made their faces turn into the demons on camera. Other than that big props the make up crew. (It's essential to have a good make up crew in a horror movie. The more realistic it looks without computers, the scarier it is.)

THE PLOT/STORY LINE: They stuck with the original story line for the most part. They changed the name of the house to the Broussard House? or something close to that. In the original it was called the Hull house, which I liked better. There was a better handle on the party there. It was $10 at the door and open bar... That's it? Really? I'm going to next years for that price haha. It baffled me that they were able to hook up stereo equipment, a bar, lights and have a HUGE party in a place that was abandoned. It wasn't an abandoned funeral home though, which I thought would have been cooler than a place where a girl just hung herself.

Yes I have different formats for rating movies haha. DON'T JUDGE ME!

I guess if you're bored one day, and have nothing to do, and someone calls you up and starts talking about how bored they are. Then you guys realize you can be bored together and do something boring. You guys go out for a walk and see a guy riding his bike. He flips his bike, lands in a ditch, and this dvd flys out of his bike basket and into your hands. That DVD is Night of the Demons. You don't see the guy for 10 minutes and you assume he's injured or just walking away. Now your friends like, "Hey want to go watch this movie? There's really nothing else to do on a Sunday night at 7 pm when all the malls are closed and we're both broke". Finally you say... "Fine". If that ever happens to you, then watch it. Want to see the nude scenes you pervs? Just Google them and save the money.

THE END of this movie

A Nightmare on Elm Street Remake: My Outburst/It's Okay, everyone cries

2010-10-13T19:39:00.000-07:00

So the title has nothing to do with what I'm about to write. There is no outburst, and I'm pretty sure that no one is going to be crying. Even if I did cry, crying is okay. What the fuck am I talking about?

OKAY, so I got a chance to see the remake of, "A Nightmare on Elm Street." Before I saw this movie, I was part of the whole skeptical group of old school Freddy fans, and didn't care to see the remake especially if Robert Englund wasn't playing Freddy. I was 100% sure that no one in this entire world was able to pull of the boogeyman other than Mr. Englund. Some movie parts are just made for one person. Once those shoes are filled, it's really unlikely that you're going to find anyone else who can do the job just the same. It's like when Michael Keaton played Batman. I was so used to him being the Dark Knight, and then assholes like Val Kilmer and George Clooney came along and destroyed it. Kilmer wasn't terrible, but Michael Keaton was the fucking man.

There's an overwhelming trend in movies today where old school classics are being reborn constantly. It's definitely struck the horror scene more so than any other genre. There's also a common trend in a lot of the old school horror fans hating on the remakes. I'm pretty much a self proclaimed hater on most horror remakes.

REMAKE THOUGHTS:

THE TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE: I didn't hate it, thought it was just okay. I really enjoyed Robert Lee Emery's part as the Sheriff. That guy is awesome.

FRIDAY THE 13: Sucked. I can't believe I bought that movie. I got the box set for Christmas last year and that eased the pain.

THE AMITYVILLE HORROR: I thought this movie was actually pretty good. I'm a fan of the Amityville legend, and that movie definitely fit in.

THE CRAZIES: This movie wasn't terrible. I'm pretty happy I downloaded it over spending the $20 on blu-ray. It's definitely a movie to watch if you haven't seen the original. The plot is cool especially with the whole plane in the marsh thing.

A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET

For once in my life, I really don't have anything negative to say except... why is Freddy all of a sudden a fucking pedophile? Like through out the movie they made it clear as fucking day that he did sexual things with Nancy when she was 5 years old. Apparently Wes Craven wanted to make him a rapist in the original movie but ended up not doing it due to current world issues at the time. I think it kind of puts a bad name on Freddy in a way. I liked it the way it was when he was just a child murderer, and the he killed all these kids.

I won't say I'm a fan of the remake but I definitely won't put it down. The dude who played the new Freddy had big shoes to fill and I gotta say he did a decent job. Freddy's new look is kind of down syndromish? Don't mean to offend anyone, but that's just the unintentional ignorant impression that I got. The voice was awesome. There were a few jokes here and there, but overall it wasn't terrible.

Of course the no name actors and actresses led to some mediocre acting.

Don't ignore the movie if you're a fan of the old one. It's not even that long. Rent it on Netflix, Blockbuster, iTunes, whatever. No one says you have to buy it.

It was definitely better than the Friday the 13th remake, that is totally for sure.

So I was Googling horror movie remakes that are coming up, and I'm kind of shocked at what I found.

FUTURE REMAKES

CHILDS PLAY: I've talked about this before. I think it's a good idea. The dude who does Chuckies voice is returning and that's pretty much all that matters with this remake. I feel as if Child's Play was cheated out of good sequels. The first two movies were the only ones watching. The rest of them were just made to make some money. I think a remake and a darker story can really turn that Good Guy Doll into a murdering masterpiece. The horror scene needs a good thrasher story. Let's hope they do it.

EVIL DEAD: Yes and no... I'm gonna say no. A big no. Chances are Bruce won't be back to play his young gorgeous Ash character... If it ain't Bruce, it ain't happening.

THE GATE: Are you kidding me? That movie is fine right where it is. Those little monkey goblinites that come from that little hole cannot be replace with computer digitalized cgi monkey goblinites... fuck no to this!

PEOPLE UNDER THE STAIRS: Loved this movie as a kid. Just watched it a few months back. It definitely doesn't need to be remade... leave it alone.

POLTERGEIST: This is probably number 32 on the Worst Ideas of All Time list. This movie was more than just a story line. The actors and actresses had such unique roles that trying to find people that share the same unique characteristics is going to take a life time. Who's gonna play the midget psychic lady? or Carol Ann? or Kane? All of those people had something eerie about them.

SCREAM: So let me get this rumor straight. On the interwebs, it says that they are not only making a new Scream, but it's going to be a whole new reboot starring the same actors? How does that work? Why was Scream even considered a horror movie to begin with? Fuck that. I hated the Scream movies. Fuck you and don't make anymore. STOP! Okay I'm done with this.

Now the last movie that's in the works of being rebooted is a movie that I have grown up with and loved for a very long time. I'm talking about the movie IT starring Tim Curry as the evil Pennywise the dancing clown. Why does this movie need a remake? That's a good question! If you ask me, I'd say you're fucking retarded. The one and only thing about the movie/book was at the end when he turns into a fucking Spider. That pissed me off. All of this clown evilness and it ends up just being one big ugly fucking spider. But I guess that's what makes the movie so... different? Besides, Jonathan Brandis is in that movie. Don't piss on his legacy haha. LEAVE IT ALONE!

October

2010-10-02T08:50:00.000-07:00

I woke up this morning and opened up my window to get a feel for the air. As soon as I opened it, I got this nice cool breeze that brought the smell of dead leaves, bare trees, and all the other ingredients that lets my nose and body know it's almost halloween.

The month of October my state of New Jersey really comes alive. During this month, New Jersey has all kinds of things to do. Of course there's pumpkin picking, hay rides/haunted or just regular, haunted houses, etc... The Weird New Jersey magazine alway comes out in October so there's always new material to read up on and go visit (I know people know about the Weird US and Weird books but the whole "Weird" books started off in New Jersey. Hence the name, Weird NJ. We don't get books, just really thick magazines haha). A lot of the time visiting the horror places from the Weird NJ magazine gets you in trouble with the cops but it's usually no more then a, "Please go home and stop stalking the neighborhood". I guess it's kind of suspicious to be 2 hours away from home, driving through back roads in a town we've never heard of at 1 a.m. But I'm not gonna lie, the thrill is worth the ride.

October for me also means that I'm busting out the horror movies. I mean with me they're always out but this is when my friends get into the halloween spirit and we watch all kinds of movies. It's usually the classics that get played more, but I think this year I need to get situated with the SAW movies. I've only seen SAW 1 and SAW 2. I never really took the time to watch the other 20 SAW movies but I think they're gonna make the cut this October (that's a good slasher movie saying, "They're gonna make the CUT, MUAHAHAHAH). Ok that's enough. Also I want to get the new Nightmare on Elm Street dvd as well as the Night of the Demons remake(I talk about that movie too much). Last year the movie event at my house was the SHINING!!! Great times. I hope all of you have horror moviethon.

Unfortunately my township has been lacking in the halloween spirit, and rarely show any kinds of halloween life around here. Don't me wrong Jersey is full of Halloween spirit but not really in my area. We don't get as many trick or treaters as we used to. My streets used to be flooded with halloween decorations and trick or treaters. Kids would start trick or treating from the time they got out of school all the way until 11 p.m. at night. Now were lucky if we get any trick or treaters before 5 p.m. There are a lot of mixed ethnicities and cultures in our area now where none of them believe or celebrate the halloween festivities. It kind of sucks. I don't want to sound like I'm bashing these people but I think some parents and others take this holiday a bit to seriously. I don't let them ruin it for me though.

I'm gonna take pictures and videos of this month on the blog of all the places we visit. Anything Halloween related will definitely be posted.

I love this month!

The Walking Dead: Book 1 Review

2010-09-26T14:24:00.000-07:00

So after reading book 1 of The Walking Dead I have to say that I'm kind of mad at myself for not getting into this graphic novel sooner. I was never able to get my self fully into comics and graphic novels at an earlier age. My friends were not really into them so I never was properly introduced and shown the ropes. I loved watching cartoons of comic book heroes like: X-Men, Spiderman, Batman, etc... but I figured getting into the comic books wouldn't be worth it, especially if I wanted to start from the beginning. There are all kinds of authors, artists, and it just seemed like a lot to follow.

The Walking Dead sparked interest in me when a friend of mine posted a video trailer for the show that's coming out on AMC on Halloween. It kind of reminded me of the 28 Days Later plot.

The book that I've been providing links and pictures of is Book 1. Now there are technically two book ones for this series. There is Book 1 which is the first story, which consists of the first six comics. Then there's book 1 which is the first two stories which consists of comics 1-12. It's really weird to explain how they do it. I guess a little bit of research won't help haha. But it's simple. I rather not explain fully because I'm more than likely to get you over confused with something so little.

I ordered the hard cover book 1 and said I was ordering 1 and 2, but I didn't I wanted to see how the first book went and now I'm kicking myself in the ass. I'm probably going to start buying the individual stories to collect the books as one instead of combining two books in one. The soft covers are the individual stories and the hard covers have cool concept art at the end.

The Walking Dead is a very well written graphic novel. It's a story of survival during a zombie apocalypse. During the first two stories, "Days Gone By" and "Miles Behind Us". The story kind of gives me a Romero feeling. It's not a comical or happy kind of story. It's got a lot of fucked up things going on, and some incidents that surprise you.

The main character is Rick. Rick is a cop who gets shot and falls unconscious and wakes up in a hospital bed. After calling for help, he gets out of his bed only to find out that in his area of the hospital, he is alone. Eventually Rick goes on to find out that not only is the hospital abandoned, but his whole town is as well.

Rick goes back home to find his wife and kid, and they're gone too. Ricks main goal is to find his wife and son, and he won't stop at it until he does.

Rick is the good guy. He kind of reminds of Jack from Lost. He's always trying to do good and help out. If you have or have not read it, you'll eventually see what I mean.

The artwork is awesome even though it's in black and white.

I can't wait to pick up some more books and read them. It's one of those zombie stories where you get a great dosage of drama, action, great artwork and forth. Hopefully the show doesn't stray away from the stories. The stories are definitely good enough and should not be tampered with.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

DEAD RISING 2 THIS TUESDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Nothing Interesting Today

2010-09-18T19:59:00.000-07:00

Let's take a minute to ask ourseves... "Do I have a plan for ZA?"

Sure, it's simple to say that were gonna rob a gun store and get an infinity amount of ammo, and just spray the shit out of some zombies with an AK or a shotgun. Unfortunately that's not how it's going to go at all. In fact, I think it's time for our fellow zombie people to start thinking more creatively than just using guns. We play video games like Dead Rising, we watch movies like Shaun of the Dead, we read all of the zombie novels out there, and we listen to zombie podcasts like You've Got Dead on You. A lot of these media's teach us how to destroy zombies in more unique ways. Search your house for useless things that can be turned into something that can penetrate zombie flesh.

FOR CHRIST SAKE GET A PLAN!!!!

Seriously though...

Gather friends and/or family and then plan this out.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

READING THIS: The Walking Dead: Book One

Zombie Ants are the Walking Dead!!!!!!!!!

2010-09-08T08:46:00.000-07:00

Whoaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa long time no blog!!!! Sorry guys! I've been busy with some things and yet again been feeling under the weather. I'm feeling pretty good right now so that's all that matters. I've never gone this long (17 days haha) without blogging something.

~There's oh so much to talk about~

Dead Rising 2

I've talked a lot about this game in the past and I was highly anticipating the games release at the end of August. Wellllllllllllll apparently I was completely uninformed that the game was pushed back one more month. Instead of it being released August 31st, it was going to be released on September 28th. BUT, on August 31st they had released a downloadable content called DEAD RISING 2 CASE ZERO for the Xbox 360 (don't know about PS3). This was pretty bad ass. It's not just a demo, it's a full blown game that parts with the actual game that comes out in a few weeks. I was in zombie destroying heaven. The cool thing is, you can create weapons. I took a bat and some nails and made like a Hellraiser Pinhead bat. There's also circular saws that you can throw that can take out a few zombies depending where you throw it. I also got my hands on a drill bit. YES! A fucking drill bit! Unfortunately I didn't fully play the game. I played about 5 minutes of it before I had to go cater to some friends who kept begging me to jump on Call of Duty.

Now just like any popular franchise game that comes out, there's always going to be a special edition or collectors edition with awesome cool accessories that I'm probably never going to need but it's cool to have them anyway kind of thing. Well Dead Rising 2 has 3 different collectors edition sets but only 2 are worth talking about.

Zombrex Collectors Edition

The Zombrex Collectors Set Comes With:

Exclusive Two-Disc Steelbook case includes:
- Dead Rising 2 game disc
- High-Definition game disc with 83 Minute "Zombrex Dead Rising Sun" motion picture and 24 minute "Making of" featurette
Complete box contents include:
- Steelbook case (described above)
- Zombrex "Syringe" pen
- Zombrex "Prescription" notepad (25 pages)
- Zombrex "Safety" card
- Zombrex "Prospectus" Sales Brochure (16 pages)
- Dead Rising 2 Hardback Artbook (48 pages)
HIGH STAKES EDITION
- Dead Rising® 2 for your PS3 or Xbox 360
- Custom Fortune City Poker Set including:
  Custom matte black Fortune City Poker Case
  100 Fortune City Poker Chips in 4 different colors
  2 sets custom blood-stained Fortune City Playing Cards featuring character art
  1 blood stained Dealer Chip
  5 green Dice
- Fortune City Visitor Map including ads for Fortune City locations and attractions
- 1 Terror Is Reality XVII admission ticket with code for exclusive Psycho DLC
  costume and skills set
- One Dead Rising® 2 High Stakes Edition includes a special "golden" ticket redeemable for Burt The Zombie - a 6’ OxMox zombie replica!!
I ordered both box sets because I'm a fool and I need cool things like poker chip sets and syringe pens. I'll eventually sell one of my Xbox 360 games to someone without all the cool things that come with it.

Zombrex Collectors Edition is at www.deadrising-2.net

High Stakes Edition is at www.capcom.com
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The Earliest Evidence of Zombies
By Rebecca L. Brown

Evidence of ‘zombie ants’ dating back forty eight million years has been identified from the Rhine Rift Valley, Germany. The evidence, a series of cuts on fossilised leaves which were recently uncovered by researchers, match those made by modern carpenter ants infected with the fungus Ophiocordyceps Unilateralis. This parasitic fungus enters the ants as spores and then alters their behaviour to further it’s own spread and growth before killing off the host and producing more spores. Infected ants bite into the undersides of leaves in specific locations, a behaviour which does not seem to occur in uninfected ants.

Find out more about these ancient zombie ants and their modern counterparts athttp://www.nature.com/news/2010/100817/full/news.2010.415.html?s=news_rss.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
This Halloween is going to be a very very good one. I was recently informed by a friend that there's going to be a Walking Dead television series. Honestly being the horror fan that I am, I was kind of unfamiliar with the whole Walking Dead comics/books/graphic novels (whatever you want to refer to them as).

Then I saw this

As soon as I saw that, I ordered this

The Walking Dead: Book One
and
The Walking Dead: Book Two

Book One has the first 12 issues, and Book Two has 13-24. I'll eventually order the others but of course, I'll start off with these.

Well that's it for now guys.

Arty

Shooting Zombies in VEGAS!!!!

2010-08-22T11:15:00.001-07:00

Hello fellow friends!!!!!!!!!

Just a real quick post here. If you're a Youtube channel internetard like I am, then you'd probably know who Charles Trippy and Ali Speed (aka Internet Killed Television). I've been a fan of these guys for a little over a year now and just recently they took a trip to Las Vegas for Alli's 21st birthday party. While they were down there, they came across this gun shop that had all kinds of cool guns you could shoot. They had the average guns we know of to high tech guns, and guns dating all the way back from World War 2! In the shooting range they let you pick a gun package and your own target to shoot at! There were tons of zombies, zombie clowns, murderers, terrorists, etc... but of course being the professionals that they are, they chose the zombie package!

Watch below!!!

Definitely looks like a good time, and I'm definitely hitting that place up when I go to Las Vegas. It just might be the only chance I'll ever get to take a shot at a zombie... til the apocalypse comes!!!!!!!

HAPPY FRIDAY THE 13TH

2010-08-13T07:36:00.000-07:00

Happy Friday the 13th everyone! Friday the 13th's aren't as cool as they used to be though. I remember back in the day (early 90's era) when they used to play a lot, and I mean A LOT of horror movies on all channels to celebrate Friday the 13th. I mean some people think it's only fitting to watch the Friday the 13th movies, but not me.

I'll throw a quick random list out there for you, maybe to help you mix it up a bit!

ICE CREAM MAN

This was a cool movie I picked up at Blockbuster video back when it was cool to rent vhs tapes. It's a little under budgeted but it has Clint Howard (Ron Howards brother) in it and that guy is awesome. He's played in like 300 something movies I think... I dunno, but check this movie out if you can.

EVIL DEAD 2

The sequel to Sam Raimi's first amazing movie, The Evil Dead. The reason I picked the 2nd one is because it's my personal favorite of the 3 movies, and it introduces you to the chainsaw hand, and it's the prequel to Army of Darkness.

POLTERGEIST 2

It looks like I'm picking sequels here haha. I'm not! I thought the first Poltergeist was the best of the 3 but the 2nd movie has Kane. Kane is the evil man with the big toothy grin who's always walking along the sidewalks singing some song. He eventually goes to the house and wants to see Carol Ann but of course they make him leave. And how could you not be creeped out by that midget lady?

KILLER KLOWNS FROM OUTER SPACE

I don't think I need to explain this movie at all. This was an awesome movie to watch on Friday the 13th. It never gets old. Klowns from outer space, killing people, and stuffiing them into human size cotton candy bags. AWESOME!

PLANET TERROR

Ok I wasn't making this mini list without a zombie movie. It's debatable whether or not you'd want to consider these creatures zombie like, but all I'm saying is the kid who put a bullet through his head comes back haha. Whatever, this movie seems like it's been sitting on the shelf for a while, and it's definitely not one to ignore for too long. It's the better movie of the Grindhouse series so give throw it in the mix!

Not the greatest movie selection for a Friday the 13th night but no one said you had to listen to me!!!!

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Eyes shrink to pinpoints,

The deeply crimson scent flooding flaring nostrils.
There is a madness in the metallic tang
Which overwhelms her
Swallowing her up.
With numb, uncaring fingers
She claims her prize.

By. Rebecca Brown

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

So I think I might have posted something on here or on Facebook about a Zombie Walk in the state of New Jersey and I didn't know if it was going to happen or not until my friend showed me a flyer that was being handed out at the Mayhem Festival. Well they're doing a Zombie Walk in Asbury Park, New Jersey on October 30th. The cool thing about this though is that it's actually all part of "ZombieCon" I think this is the first zombie convention that I've heard of and that's so fucking cool!

Anyways, I requested a single merchandise table even though I'm not selling anything. I was going to set up a table with some free Zombie Digest stickers and buttons if they filled out the mailing list shit and took a flyer. There will eventually be merchandise stuff like that. Hopefully switching this site over to a www.zombiedigest.com too. Wouldn't that be friggin sweet? Soon soon soon. I'm just happy to see my state doing something so cool other than womens golfing tournaments and people making a big deal about Snooki sightings.

Until next time

KEEP SURVIVING!

UPDATE August 3, 2010

2010-08-03T05:02:00.000-07:00

OPENING WORD

Ok so it's been a while since I did a small update. I did the book review and then I introduced a new writer to our page, Rebecca L Brown. She's a very talented writer and I'm very ecstatic that she's going to be writing and contributing to the page. I originally thought her first post was a created story of her own but it ended being true, which was awesome. It just goes to show that she's writes well.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

NIGHT OF THE DEMONS REMAKE

So I may have or may not have talked about this in the past. If I have just read it again damnit! I don't know if anyone knows about the old 80's and 90's horror film collection called NIGHT OF THE DEMONS and NIGHT OF THE DEMONS 2. If you went to blockbuster in the early 90's then you'd know these movies were a smash hit in the horror section. Every week I'd go to rent one and they'd either be gone or the dude at Blockbuster video wouldn't let me rent it because I was only 7 years old.

The first movie was about a bunch of teens who are all dressed up for halloween and are ready to party. They end up choosing an abandoned funeral home called Hull House to throw the party at. The kids start to party, people turn into demons, and people die. That's about it.

There weren't any big named actors except for the blonde chick in the second one. I don't know her name off the bat but she's married to Ben Stiller. The first NOTD seemed low budgeted and poorly shot with terrible voice overs in some spots. BUT!!!! the movie had some awesome make work to it. I eventually watched both on Halloween one year because they played both movies back to back.

ANYWAYS......... They filmed a remake in 2008/2009 and it's finally being released in October. Shannon Elizabeth (American Pie) is going to be playing the main demon girl named Angela and Edward Furlong (American History X and Terminator 2) has some kind of role in it as well. I'm hoping the writers stuck with the story and didn't use any cheesy CGI to ruin the movie. Too many movies rely on CGI. There is no word whether it will be released on DVD right away or if it will be put into select theaters. Originally it was supposed to be DVD release but being that they're waiting for October, it could have a theatrical presentation.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Nothing crazy going on right now. I was under the weather for a few weeks with migraines. Long story short, I did something stupid and paid the price. But I'm feeling better so it's fine. Expect some more posts from me soon and definitely Rebecca as well.

btw is anyone going to this in NJ?

http://www.monstermania.net/

Clairvius Narcisse; Haitian Zombie?

2010-07-26T13:09:00.000-07:00

Clairvius Narcisse; Haitian Zombie?

By. Rebecca L. Brown

Clairvius Narcisse was declared dead on the 2nd May 1962 and yet in 1980 he returned to his home, the village of I’Estere in Haiti with an almost unbelievable story of magic and zombies. Could Narcisse and others like him truly be the walking undead?

After investigating reports of ‘zombies‘ (including Narcisse and a handful of others), researchers believed that Narcisse was given a dose of ’zombie powder’, a mixture containing tetrodotoxin (pufferfish venom) and bufotoxin (toad venom), by a ‘sorcerer’ to induce a coma which mimicked the appearance of death. He was then allowed to return to his home where he collapsed, ‘died’ and was buried. His body was then recovered and he was given doses of datura stramonium to create a compliant zombie-like state and set to work on a plantation. After two years, the plantation owner died and Narcisse simply walked away to freedom and spent the next sixteen years of his life trying to return home.

It was explained that Narcisse had broken one of many traditional behavioural codes and was made into a ‘zombie’ as a punishment; when questioned, Narcisse told investigators that the sorcerer involved had ‘taken his soul’.

But was any of this true? Traces of ‘zombie powder’ presented for analysis were found to contain varying amounts of tetrodotoxin; whilst some samples could have caused death-like comas, others were unlikely to have had the reported effect or indeed any effect at all.

The original researchers argued that cultural beliefs played a role in reinforcing the action of the chemicals. In Haitian culture, there is a widespread belief in the existence of zombies. Narcisse reported that he had heard doctors declare him dead and had been aware of being buried and exhumed. If all evidence suggested he was a zombie, why should he believe any differently? It is impossible to confirm Narcisse’s story but it would seem likely that creating a zombie-like state would be possible through the processes described.

Would ‘zombies’ created in this way be classed as undead though? As Narcisse was never actually dead in the first place, only unconscious, the answer is no. The Haitian ‘zombies’, then, were never truly reanimated despite their return from beyond the grave.

Rebecca L. Brown is a British writer. She specialises in horror, SF, humour, surreal and experimental fiction, although her writing often wanders off into other genres and gets horribly lost. For updates and examples of Rebecca’s work, visit her Twitter page @rlbrownwriter or her blog Bewildering Circumstances ( http://bewilderingcircumstances.blogspot.com/ )

Dr Dale's Zombie Dictionary: The A-Z Guide to Staying Alive. BOOK REVIEW

2010-07-19T08:36:00.000-07:00

Where do I even begin with such greatness? I was given a copy of Dr. Dale's Zombie Dictionary to do a review on, and I was completely blown the fuck away. This book consists of every little nook and cranny about what it takes to survive in the up and coming zombie apocalypse. There are books circulating all over the world with the similar topic, but I truly feel none of them hit the topic harder, and are more accurately structured than Dr. Dale's book.

Dr. Dale did an amazing job with the words he chose for his guide. You're going to find a lot of unique things when it comes to the mind of Dr. Dale. I liked the humor and pop culture references that occasionally pop up. "LEAVE BRITNEY ALONNEEE!!!" (haha totally kidding). The references added to the awesomeness of this book. There are a lot of words in here that you wouldn't expect like: Spiderman Zombies. Do you know what that is? I didn't know what that meant until I read the book. Am I going to tell you? No, order the book!!! Another personal favorite word of mine was: YMCA. Probably one of the most brilliant things I've ever read in my life.

Anyways.

One of the things I liked about this book was the information given. Dr. Dale doesn't just give you a word and a definition. He breaks down every word and includes as much information and knowledge as possible. He breaks down every possibility of survival and gives you a buffet of options. As an American, it's obvious we love buffets! In all seriousness though, I find mind self hanging up my machines guns, and I'm going to start stocking up on peanuts and training sheep. I know now to never try and hide in a kangaroos pouch during the apocalypse.

In all honesty you can't go wrong with this book. There's no way this book gets shelved especially when the zombie apocalypse can hit any time. I read this book twice and both times I was laughing, and other times I was so focused on what I was reading because that's how powerful this book is. Yeah it's a humorous book, but Dr. Dale sets the line and presents you with a legit survival guide. There are no made up infections in this book. He takes knowledge and gives you the facts. You won't find this in your fiction section folks.

I recommend this book to whomever reads this blog. I'm serious, I can almost guarantee it that this will be your new favorite book. It's my new favorite book! So that means it will be yours too!

Thanks to the guys over at How to Survive a Zombie Apocalypse for giving me a chance to review Dr. Dale's book.

My Ideal Zombie

2010-07-08T14:46:00.000-07:00

I want my zombie to be slow moving.

I want my zombie to have its arms stretched out forward so it's easier to grab me.

I want my zombie to have a vocabulary. This vocabulary will consist of one word... BRAAAIIINNNSSSS!

I want my zombie to be created by some zombie making gas, or some kind of experiment gone terribly wrong.

I want my zombie to be evil looking and deadly.

I don't want my zombie to have a high metabolism.

I want my zombie to die with one bullet through the brain.

I want my zombie to be able to smell living flesh.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Check the links in the sidebar.

You've Got Dead On You just recently popped episode number 14 for download, and they've been doing all kinds of things that let the listeners get involved which is really cool. Go give them a listen!

There are a lot of Facebook sites on the right of the page. One of the groups has a lot of people involved in the zombie fan mayhem and that's Zombie Apocalypse Preparation. Non Practical is a well spoken leader/mentor for the ones who care to survive. NP covers every ground of survival so you don't forget!

Also, I am almost done with Drs. Zombie Dictionary. I had a problem with printing it before and it took a while for Staples to turn it into print form for me cause it was so big. So finally I will have the review... finally... soon!

keep surviving.

Edison Zombie Walk

2010-07-01T06:08:00.000-07:00

So I've been thinking about getting a zombie walk together in my township. I'm sure there are ones around the area, and I'm sure they're great, but I don't care to look haha. I want one in my township of Edison. I got my pen and pad and started writing down some ideas of what I can propose to the mayor or whomever I find the right person to send it to. As I'm writing, I realized this is the same dude I wanted to propose a Zombie Apocalypse Plan to a few months ago and worried that he'd probably put me in a looney bin. Regardless, I'm more into getting the zombie walk on and that was my main goal right now. Maybe when I get the zombie walk, I can propose the Edison Plan to him as a joke/serious matter and this way it would fit the character, rather than just another nut bag in his book.

The big problem is, what do I write to him that would even sound slightly convincing?

Dear Mayor,

I wanted to thank you for keeping Edison in tip top shape, and I want to send my condolences for not winning the Democratic race to be our mayor for next year. The big question here is, I wanted to know if you'd be interested in allowing me to form a zombie walk. Thank you.

Then I'd get an interview with him. And this is how it would go.

Mayor: Hi Arthur, how's it going?

Me: Good, gre...

Mayor: (cutting Me off), anyways, I had gotten your letter about the Zombie march?

Me: Zombie walk, it's a walk...

Mayor: (cutting Me off again), whatever it is, it sounds kind of extreme, and violent. what is it?

Me: It's where a bunch of people dress up like zombies, and they walk from destination to destination, kind of just giving people the willy's.

Mayor: Is there a purpose to this?

Me: to have fun?

Mayor: So this is just an irrelevant waste of time?

Me: YOU'RE AN IRRELEVANT WASTE OF TIME!

Haha, okay that wouldn't really be how it happens, but I can imagine just an extreme awkward looks on his face and him possibly saying no. I mean it would make more sense to do it around halloween time to make it even less crazy. My townships really old school and lazy when it comes to township projects.

I'll think of something and invite everyone! I'm sure if I get donations and give them to the township to help them plant another tree somewhere, they'd love it. We don't fix parks, baseball fields, ponds, roadways, or anything that's relevant in this town. Instead, we spend all of our township money on planting a tree somewhere. Two months later, right where that very tree is planted, we knock down the trees anyway and build condominium complex. This town is retarded.

That's all for now, keep surviving.

Lucas Jones and the Jersey Apocalypse Part 1

2010-06-23T18:56:00.000-07:00

I don't worry about bathrooms in this zombie apocalypse. I think zombies still have their senses and would probably tweak at the smell of my number 2. That's a good thing isn't it? I wouldn't call shitting my pants the perfect strategy for chasing zombies away, but if it clears the way to safety then I wouldn't mind kick standing a log in my Hanes for a while.

I've been in this... disaster? tragedy? end of the world? for about 10 days now. Just like all of those zombie movies I've watched over the years, everything is panning out to be what all of those writers had imagined it would be. They were perfect on the part where a lot of the towns turned into ghost towns, and I was able to go to any store and take what I want for free. The only problem with that is, no one is on Xbox Live right now playing Left 4 Dead 2 or Call of Duty Modern Warfare 2... Those people are living the video game life now, aren't they? What's the point of a cell phone when people are dead or the satellites aren't being controlled? No television to watch shows because there was no one programming a station. This really sucked.

What might be a battle for survival for some people is more like a battle to beat starvation! Just like the flesh eating zombies who are constantly dealing with hunger, I'm on the road trying to find the food that isn't outdated and edible. Spaghettios and Chef Boyardee were considered first class air line delicacies to me. Of course canned goods and preserved meats were the best thing going right now. It sucks that milk doesn't last very long so I enjoyed my cereal as much as I could before those gallons filled with lumps.

So what is my purpose for writing this memoir? Honestly I found a guys Macbook (not air or pro, the shitty one) and I wanted to test it out. I've heard about a million and one different things about Macbooks, and when I saw this one I figured I might as well give it a try being that I had no plans for the rest of the day, or for the rest of humanity for that matter. I was always a PC guy, maybe the zombie apocalypse would turn me into a MAC! I figured I'd write about what's going on just incase something happens of course. Maybe someone will find it some day and see that ZA (Zombie Apocalypse) existed. I'm also just writing this to take my mind off of things. It helps the days go by faster.

What have I been doing for 10 days you ask?

Well the first day I pretty much slept through attacks. That's the awesome thing about living in my friends attic (besides being asbestos free). Here at Rutgers Campus in New Brunswick, New Jersey, there's a lot of kids who need to find a place to live during the school year. I didn't actually go to school there... well no one does now, but you get my point. I was kicked out of my parents house for smoking too much weed and I'm kind of hoping the zombies got those two assholes. I just called my parents assholes, but hear me out. My mom left my father and I a long time ago. What I later found out is that it was because he was cheating on her with some arrogant whore. He married her, he hated me, she hated me, end of story. I hope they filled the bellies of two starving flesh eaters. I'm not going back for them.

I slept through some of the chaos because I was baked from the night before. I usually turn the stereo on blast cause I hated hearing my roommate Jim and his girlfriend fucking every night right below. I felt like Jesus because I was above them and hearing everything they said to each other... even the little things like Jim saying, "Next time I'll pull out in time." That's a phone a call he'll be glad to never hear.

I came down from the attic, and I walked into the living room and all I saw were body parts including Jim's. That's one way to not become a father. I kind of freaked out but then went into the kitchen to get some Waffle Crisp. We didn't have any milk so I took a drive over to the closest 7-11 and there was just mayhem upon mayhem. There were people being chased by zombies, and being eaten by zombies too. I had seen one of my other roommates get mauled and for some reason I just laughed. He was the douche bag who stuck my head in the toilet bowl after he took a dump when I was drunk. Talk about karma. I could have easily done it to him, but no, he had to have his flesh eaten away from his bones by a zombie... oh well..

I started driving with no intention on going back to Rutgers or any place. I ended up going North about an hour and a half to two hours to the town of West Milford. There was a little shopping mall next to a hotel and that's where I've been hiding out all of these days. There are a bunch of families living in here but no one on the outside knows it. I took this MAC from the Best Buy that was in the shopping mall along with an iPod and every CD that I wanted.

My neighbor George next door completely robbed Dicks Sporting Goods of every weapon and ammo that they had. This guy was fucking CRAZY!!!!! He's a very cool person though. He always goes out and brings back food for him, his 5 girlfriends, and I. Yes believe it or not, he's still managing to be a pimp in this zombie apocalypse. He's a big dude and I mean muscular. Ex body builder and believe it or not, a children's book writer. I've never felt safer in my entire life.

Anyhow, George said were gathering a few people and moving out of this place. He said that there's way too many zombies that have been running around here. He managed to get a school bus for anyone that wanted to tag along. I think he said he wanted to leave in two days. Where we were going? I have no idea, but I trust George. He had left me a present on my coffee table in the hotel room. It was a Desert Eagle... I'm guessing I might need this where were going?

Well that's all for now. I will write in this when we arrive at the next destination, if that's anywhere.

Lucas Jones

Flesh Eating Updates!!!!

2010-06-17T07:18:00.000-07:00

Yes, that is a massively huge banner for the guys at HOW TO SURVIVE A ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE. These dudes from the UK put on a show and from what I've read, they do a damn good job. If you live in the UK then I seriously suggest going to see these guys perform. I'm hoping one day they come to the States and do a show, but who the hell wants to come to America? I'd rather travel and go to the UK. The UK has lots of haunted history to it and that is something I'd be willing to visit. I watch too much TV, but I from what I can remember there are a lot of haunted castles. That would be awesome!

So if anyone is going to the UK, preferably Scotland, let me know. I'll pay for the boat ride and all. Sorry, no planes for me. Remember Flight of the Dead? how about Snakes on a Plane? Now what if the plane had both of those things.? I rather be swallowed whole by JAWS than to be eaten alive or bitten by stupid slithering creatures...

But seriously, go see these guys. There is a banner above for the "HOW TO SURVIVE A ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE RELOADED" site. These guys sold out last years Edinburgh Festival and that means they're about to do it again.

They've been doing tours too so if you can't go to the Edinburgh Festival you can check them out before and after as well. HOW TO SURVIVE A ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE TOUR

Don't forget about Dr. Dale's Zombie Dictionary coming out!

Click that link at the top of the page with the HOW TO SURVIVE A ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE logo and information to go straight to their website.

BEST LOGO BANNER, EVER!

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Project 72

So my friend MJ called me the other day, and she told me about this thing called Project 72. Her friend, or classmate, or someone has this website where they have people write stories for them. The stories can be only 72 words or less. She had asked me to write a few and initially I thought they were supposed to zombie/horror related, but I was wrong haha. I wrote like 4 of them but only 2 were really worth keeping. I had asked a few people to send me some on our new facebook page and I only got one, and it was really good. Definitely better than my two haha.

Here they are:

ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE

The blood streamed down my Louisville Slugger bat as I clenched my hands around the rubber grip. My eyes were closed shut cringing in fear. I opened one eye to see if the man was down and dead, he was. I couldn’t believe I had just killed a man who tried to eat my arm. If this is the zombie apocalypse, then I will fight this to the bitter end.

The Return of the Crazies

We kept driving down the long road in search of survivors and food. It’s been 39 days, 13 hours, and 58 minutes since the first attack on humanity hit. It was a biochemical weapon aboard a US Army truck. The truck popped a tire and flipped over into the local towns water stream. Anything with a heartbeat that consumes water was infected. Leaving town was our safest bet... so we thought.

Fellow fan ZACHARY GREEN sent in this one. I thought it was pretty bad ass!

FAMILY REUNION

He went to school to pick up his son. He heard, a gurgling scream of horror and pain. Rushing in through the front entrance…The Janitor was seen feasting on the corpse of a child, not his son. It turned…He ran…Down the Hall…Into the class room… “Steven! Come to Dad!”….The Boy Screams…He runs to his Son…”It’s All Going to be Alright Son, alright”…He Screams… As His Son Rips his throat out. The End.

Isn't that crazzzyyy???

Good job and thanks for sending that in Zach. Hopefully you'll write some more, I'll definitely post them.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Zombies Revenge

Are there any video game fans out there? I was wondering if any of you guys remembered the underrated console called the Sega Dreamcast? I'm sorry but that system was beyond awesome. It got such bad reviews though! One of the things that kept me playing that system was House of the Dead 2, anndddddddddddd a little game called Zombies Revenge. Zombie Revenges graphics were very similar to House of the Dead 2's but it was a third person shooter. If anyone has that game, I'll buy it off of you! I think I might need the Dreamcast first though haha...

{ I had a video here, but YOUTUBE is retarded}

Here's a link to check out some gameplay of Zombies Revenge

I think the creators of this were trying to compete with Resident Evil... nothing beats old

school Resident Evil... NOTHING!!! I'm definitely going to the video game swap shop now

and trying to find this game. Definitely a fun one!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The Fourth Kind

I'm not sure if anyone has seen this movie yet but I was bored the other day so I

gave it a shot. Apparently the there was some kind of alien abduction in the year 2000

in Alaska. It was based on true events. Through out the movie they show actual footage

of everything in one screen and then they show the acting part that matches it right next to it.

I really have absolutely no way to explain it other than you see real footage of stuff. It kind

of creeped me out a little bit because you see actual footage of some dude blowing

his wife's brains out. Of course it was in the dark though.

This psychologist who thinks that her husband was abducted by aliens starts experiencing

the same issues with her patients. They all claimed to see a white owl outside of their

window that wouldn't go away. Eventually people start going nuts and the ladies

daughter gets abducted, blah blah blah. People think that she went crazy too even though

there is real footage. It made me think of the Exorcism of Emily Rose because at

the end it pretty much tells you to believe what you want to believe. It stars Mila Jovavich

from the Resident Evil movies. I don't think it's a movie worth buying before you see it

but definitely give it a shot on like Netflix or however.

Still Coming:

------------------------------------

I owe you guys a lot!

- I'm still writing worthy Project 72 zombie/horror stories. I'll post some

soon. Hopefully more of my small fan base will do the same!

- I had to re print my Dr. Dale's Zombie Dictionary so it's taking me longer

to do a review. It will be soon though, I promise! I kind of went back to take

more notes on things because there is a lot humor and pop culture

references that make the book 10 times more awesome!

- Still haven't watched Zombie Diaries yet. I misplaced the DVD in

a box full of DVD's. I'm still moving things around. That and I bought

the Muppet show Season 1 and Red Dead Redemption for Xbox 360.

My time has been consumed!

- Still working on the Dead Rising 2 interview/whatever they'll give me!

- I am writing the zombie script still. I changed my mind and won't post

anything on here because it's kind of lame and funnier on camera

(I swear!).

and that's it for now.

Until next time,

KEEP SURVIVING!

Zombie Digest on Facebook!!!!!

2010-06-13T10:37:00.001-07:00

You should definitely join ZOMBIE DIGEST on FACEBOOK

Click that link above and join!

Go now!!!

Twilightland

2010-06-10T07:12:00.001-07:00

So if anyone has seen the new trailer for Eclipse (which is one of the Twilight Saga movies), then they'd see that one of the scenes from the movie shows a bunch of dead looking people coming out of the water slowly. I thought it was a zombie movie at first, but then it showed Edward Cullen and my zomboner went down. It kind of reminded me of Land of the Dead with the zombies in the water and coming up to shore or something... Lame!

Also I hate how Zombieland was barely acknowledged at the MTV Movie Awards even thought it is the top-grossing zombie film right now. Zombieland went in with a $23.6 milion budget and made a little under $103 million. That's pretty damn good. MTV put Zombieland under two categories that were made up just for that show. I know it's all fun and pop with that stupid station but at least give the movie some credit. Of course New Moon won everything.

I really hate those movies. The worst part about it is that New Moon and Eclipse are only 7 months apart from each other. That is two garbage movies in under a year. They put out more Twilight movies than LiL Wayne puts out mixtapes... even when he's out of jail. So retarded.

So a few weeks ago I did a post about the people I'd want by my side in a zombie apocalypse and for some reason, this totally slipped my mind. I'd totally drop robocop for Mr. Tim Allen or Tim the tool man Taylor! At first Bob Vila came to mind and I thought of how craftsman like he is. Then I thought about all the crazy and cool things that Tim Taylor has created for Tool Time. Definitely adding his name to my troupe.

Quickies:

Bought Zombie Diaries for $7.50 at Walmart the other day.

I stopped reading Monster Island and started reading and taking notes for my book review on Dr. Dale's Zombie Dictionary: The A-Z Guide to Staying Alive.

Started writing for my zombie comedy sketch/movie/whatever my heart desires! It's going to be brutal and funny. Should be out once I decide not to be lazy and put everything together.

I've trying to reach Capcom to speak to someone about doing an interview for the upcoming release of Dead Rising 2. I know it's a known thing, but just a reminder that Dead Rising 2 will be a Co-0p game. That means you can walk around Vegas or wherever, and just destroy fucking zombies all day long.

Anyone play L4D or L4D2 or Resident Evil 5 or even Call of Duty World at War (just for nazi zombies) and or Call of Duty MW 2? My xbox 360 gamer tag is: x arty mcfly x

Also in video games, I was reading on some site that it's going to take 8 years for Resident Evil 6 to come out. Why do they do that? Why do the best games take forever to do a sequel?

So I had an idea to expand my zombie horizons and try to think of something creative to do other than blog about it. I was thinking of going to certain shopping places and video taping certain items that would be good use incase you got stuck in that specific place. I was walking around Walmart the other day and I saw a few things right in the open that would make life so much easier during the apoc. The Walmart in New Jersey does not sell guns. So the next best thing would obviously be something light and sharp. They sell more knives than... a knife store? They had machete's right in the open. Anyone can buy a machete, even a kid. I thought to myself, "I'm taking like 4 of these!" My downfall of Walmart would be their chair and pillow section, sometimes it's hard to walk through there and not want to jump on the couch and just put a few pillows behind your head, and just passsss out.

As I write this, I'm adding more to the beginning til the end. I'd tell you to read this from the bottoms up, but where's the fun in that?

Ok that's all for now. My next post will be an excerpt from the sketch I'm writing.

Keep Surviving!

Very small and brief post. Seriously, only read if you're bored. I'm not kidding.

2010-06-03T12:30:00.000-07:00

Totally just forgot which e-mail I used for this account. That's how unintelligent I am.

Not much to talk about this time around. I'm currently dealing with a lot of shit lately. I have two papers to do for school that are due on Sunday, girlfriend just dumped me for reasons that made no sense whatsoever, dealing with doctors for my surgery, mom's been in out of doctors and having to do a few things for fellow zombiites (zom b ites). My lifes been packed basically.

Just watched the remake of the Crazies the other day (no movie review but if I had to I'd give 3 1/2 brains). I never seen the original so I can't compare it to that but overall I enjoyed it. For some reason critics bashed yet another decent horror movie. I thought it was okay honestly. One thing I will say though is that a lot of zombie flicks get a good % over at www.rottentomatoes.com . Also watched the People Under the Stairs. I don't know if I'd consider that a zombie film or not. Those zombie looking things in the basement... looked like zombies haha. They ate flesh in the movie, but they didn't seem dead, rather just caved in people that turned to stone age like guys. It's a good thing Daddy (from the movie) gave them all flashlights because they wouldn't be able to see their pray. It had one of the colored kids from Mighty Ducks in it. I had seen the movie a real long time ago, maybe when I was like 6 or 7.

I decided that I'm probably going to make a zombie short just for fun. It's summer time and I need to feel like I'm a busy person so I'm writing like a 10-15 minute zombie script for my friends and I to film. Yes I get that bored. I was tossing around ideas on what causes the zombie outbreak. It has to be dumb so probably red jello... or blue... I like blue.

So we are having yet another year full of celebrity deaths it seems. Of course the whole world knows about Gary Coleman and then Dennis Hopper died. One of the Golden Girls just recently died like... today. But I'm going to take the focus back to Mr. Dennis Hopper. I was shocked when I heard that he died. This guy is a legend especially to the horror genre. He played King Koopa in the Super Mario Bros movie, he played Paul Kaufman in Romero's Land of the Dead, the evil Howard Payne in Speed, and to me his most memorable role in The Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2 as Lefty Enright. I was a huge Texas Chainsaw fan as a young kid and he was probably the coolest character out of the franchise (fuck you if you disagree!!!). To think that people didn't know who he was when I said he died... so sad. RIP sir, you were awesome.

I talked to a popular Youtuber the other day through Facebook. He goes by the name of Shawn C Phillips aka Coolduder is his Youtube account name. He's been promoting a movie called Zombie babies which is a Eamon Hardiman film. Zombie Babies just sounds awesome. They really need help getting a jump on this film and I know they were only looking for $500 which I'm sure isn't really much of a boost. I know they reached their goal and then some but I'm sure a little bit won't help. If you donate to them you definitely get rewarded with a bunch of cool shit. I'm definitely donating next week when I get paid.

Here's the link. I think it's a good thing to help out directors and writers who are willing to put their best efforts to entertain the world. Gotta start somewhere.

Zombie Babies

You can also check out Shawn C Phillips Youtube page because this guy knows his movies. He does a lot of dvd reviews because he has a massive collection of movies. Any video that I picked that he recommended has been worth the watch. If you like 80's and 90's films with a mix of today, definitely check out his site.

Coolduder's Youtube site

You've Got Dead on You just keeps getting better and better and better.

I read somewhere that there is going to be a Romero blu ray box set collection... I will eat someone's poop if that is true. I'm serious. Find me some info and then send me the poo via UPS.

gross

I want to celebrate the 100th visitor to my site. So if you read this, and it says 100, tell me your name and I'll throw you a free sticker that I'll cheaply make on my computer.

Ok that's all for now. I'll update with some worthy posts next week when I have school and drama out of my way... but for now

Keep surviving.

SURVIVAL OF THE DEAD MOVIE REVIEW!!!!

2010-05-28T12:17:00.000-07:00

Since December of 2009 I have failed as a zombie fan to get my chubby fingers on a copy of George A. Romero's Survival of the Dead movie. I mean sure, it wasn't released in the United States yet but if I was a true zombie fan, I would have found a way instead of waiting 2 weeks prior to the American theatrical release.

I'm well aware that I was supposed to have a review earlier on in the week because I did get an advanced copy. I was just about to watch it with friends and then the opening 5 minutes or so was too gory for a 21 year old man in which he stated, "Hey you guys, can we watch like a comedy instead, I don't like this kind of stuff". Being a nice a person my one friend John and I just laughed at him, called him a bitch, and turned on something else. Then I realized this, I've always supported and went to theaters to see a Romero film. Why should I even change my ritual? I mean downloaded it and all but Romero deserves all the support and credit in the world. I went to my local theaters and here I am ready to fill my small group of fans (who have probably seen it half a year ago) void of zombie greatness.

SURVIVAL OF THE DEAD

Okay, to start this off, I just want to say I like how George A. Romero twists it up a bit. I like how the National Guard soldiers were the same people from Diary of the Dead.

I have mixed feelings really. I really liked the gore in this movie. It wasn't that much but towards the end when you see the dudes body get pulled apart and you see his spine totally made up for it.

When I watch Romero films I watch them with the intent of finding a new zombie story that isn't all about finding a safe place and escaping a mall, town, hospital, etc... I look for something different in each one. Romero is the Godfather of zombie films. Some of this movie has its humor with the way zombies are killed. I think the fire extinguisher is my new favorite weapon haha. The dynamite scene was funny as well.

In SOTD you find two families battling on Plum Island. You have the O'Flynns where Patrick O'Flynn is their leader and then you have the Muldoons where Shamus or Sheamus or whatever his name is running that family. Patrick believes that the zombies should die. He and his army set out to destroy and living dead in the area. On the other side, Shamus tries to stop people from killing the living dead. He believes that they all should live and kept alive in hope that there is a cure. He also believes in trying to teach zombies to eat animals instead of humans.

The National Guard come across a teenager in the woods and they all meet up with the others from Plum island some how... You'll have to watch the movie for yourself because I'm not spoiling anything!

Romero has a way of making the viewer feel bad for the zombies and really root for them in his films. There's always a message and that was really justified in Land of the Dead. Just seeing how they were excluded on the outskirts of a building where everyone lived happily. They used zombies for entertainment and such. This movie also makes me think of Fido in some parts. The Muldoons are the one family in zombie history to try to give the living dead a real fighting chance.

I'll give this movie @@@@ brains out of 5. I really liked this movie for the twists and turns that come out of it. You never know how a Romero film is going to come out and when you see it, you're usually pleased. Through the years a lot of zombie films have been lagging. I'm not going to lie, I wasn't big on Diary of the Dead. I think this movie made up for it though. It's totally worth the watch I think.

The movie is out now in America. Go see it, spend the $10 and don't eat anything if blood and gore turns your stomach. This isn't a disney movie.

Lost had zombies right? Well were they vegetarian? OTHER NEWS

2010-05-25T15:37:00.001-07:00

Wanted to give a HUGE fucking thank you to Jason Phelan (creator of some fine digital art and maker of Unicorn Pee beer) for the awesome banner logo he made for the site. He's done some projects for me over the years and never ceases to amaze me. Unfortunately he doesn't do it more because I really enjoy it. I'll have to start creating a lot of projects just have him create stuff haha. Thanks again dude, you're the best!

Okay so remember I said I was going to watch Survival of the Dead? Didn't do that. Twas a busy weekend for me. I watched the LOST finale and got pretty damn emotional.

I know LOST isn't zombie related fully but a lot of them had died and came back to life which kind of makes them a zombie. Sayid was dead and came back to life and even Sawyer called him a zombie. There's my segway you bastards!

It was rough to watch. I've only been watching the show since mid/late March and still, I felt the heartbreak that all the true LOST fans felt when Jack's eyes closed. I feel like beating people up with a katovel right now (Katovel is featured in the You've Got Dead on You podcast on iTunes, CHECK IT OUT!!!!). But anyways, that show is probably one of the best shows I've ever seen as a whole. I don't recall watching a show's series finale either. Not many shows I watched in life were worth watching to the end. LOST, was definitely one of those that had the potential to make it to the end.

ZOMBIES ZOMBIES ZOMBIES!!!! I GET IT!!! RELAX!!!! OFF TOPIC!!!!

Does anyone know the odds of a vegetarian zombie? How would that work genetically? I imagine there'd be some kind of error in the DNA mutation to make a zombie start craving a head... of lettuce. Wouldn't that be wickedly stupid though?

"DON'T SHOOT THAT FUCKING ZOMBIE! HE'S A HERBIVORE!"

He obviously wouldn't make it with all fire arms that will be loaded during the apocalypse. If I found the one veg eating zombie I'd take him into my home. He'd be like a cooler version of Bub from DOTD. He'd be completely brain dead but at least he'll appreciate the nice garden salad I'd make him. He or she can live out in my backyard and share the grass with the rabbits and such...

I'm sorry that's odd.

OTHER HORROR NEWS

So I apparently did not hear about the remake of Childs Play. Is this for real? I was seeing on IMDB that it is real and the coolest part about it was that the dude who did Chucky's voice in all the prior Child's Play movies is doing it in the remake. That's pretty bad ass right? I hope they let the original Andy have some kind of part or cameo because they've been pretty shitty to him over the years.

I wonder what the doll will look like. I hope they don't fuck around with this cause then I'll put some voodoo soul into my own doll and have it terrorize some fucking idiot who decided to ruin a good flick.

Hollywood is running out of ideas for movies and they just have an itch for re-doing movies. This pisses me off sooooo much but oh well, nothing the fans can do but sit back, wait and resist buying a movie ticket in hope that an original movie won't be destroyed...

It's only Child's Play though. I mean when I was a kid I loved to play Zelda and watch Chucky. No lie, I had a dream that Chucky was coming after me when I was in the bath tub but it was Link who came out the drain not Chucky. I then walked to my window and saw Chucky throwing wooden barrels at the window where I was standing. Guess who doesn't play Zelda anymore? Damn right kiddies.

That's all for now. I hate not having something important to say.

Zombie Goodies

2010-05-20T07:47:00.000-07:00

Ok Survivors, I've neglected you for 11 days now and that's not cool!

I've been currently dealing with yet another nagging tooth pain and headaches that leave me incapable of leading you guys from a zombie takeover.

I need nice teeth right? What the hell am I supposed to do when I become a zombie? My brain won't be able to function enough to grind human flesh into a blender and drink it from a straw! I need nice teeth so that when I become a zombie I can chew through some of the toughest flesh ever!!!!!!

Ok So I wanted to make a vlog for this blog in my new post but failed miserably. I had gotten some cool zombie things that I wanted to share with you all and post it as a video but instead, you'll just get the normal pictures.

WHAT I GOT?

FROM AMAZON:

Monster Island by David Wellington

Free Read of Book

This book is actually published online for free but I hate that so I bought the book. It was only like $10 and I was looking for something new to read so I picked this up. I'm only like 3 chapters into it and so far so good. I will eventually do a review on this book and brain rate it.

The Zombie Survival Guide Notes Journal

This is pretty cool. It's a mini journal that's about as tall as a soda can and as wide as two cell phones (worst measuring examples ever). It has a lot of room for you to write notes and zombie related things inside. I had intended to write my stand up comedy inside of it until I noticed that it randomly had pages that explained certain things from the actual novel. Like when I turned to a certain page it would show something about destroying your staircase. But for $8 you can't go wrong with this cool thing.

The Zombie Survival Guide Card Deck

These were an awesome pick up. It's just a deck of cards that basically makes up the Zombie Survival Guide book. It takes all aspects and strategies of Max Brooks' famous novel and puts the highlights in card form. This is so fucking cool, I can't say that enough. I don't remember how much money they were but I know they're under $10. I'm reading some right now. I'm reading the Solanum card right now as we speak.

FROM K-MART:

I don't ever shop at K-Mart...EVER!

House of the Dead: Overkill

Why this is underlined right now is beyond me. It's annoying. BUT, anyways. Definitely picked this up at K-Mart even though I linked it to Amazon, I hated going into K-Mart. That place was just outright dirty. Right when you walked in they had gloves, masks and hand sanitizer wipes to clean off of your shopping cart. It smelled in there. Of course I didn't see any of that until I was leaving. I guess they didn't want any zombie germs to spread? Or was it just swine flu. I haven't heard about that in a long time... weird. But this game was $20 and well worth it. I get to kill zombies and the dialogue in this is amazing. It's definitely made to seem like a Tarantino flick. If you have a Wii, pick this bad boy up asap!.

SHORT BUT SWEET NEWS

- I got my hands on a copy of Survival of the Dead so expect a movie review on that within the next few days. I want to get it in before it's American Theatrical release.

- I will do a review like I said before on the Monster Island book. It's going to take a while to finish though due to my school and life schedule. I read it as much as I can.

- Looking for contributing horror writers to write on whatever they feel like. I have asked a few people and looking forward to seeing what happens.

- Bought the game Alan Wake, played it for a few hours, that game creeps the hell out of me haha. Awesome game so far.

- Might have some interviews with some Youtube celebrities hopefully. Haha I called them celebrities. I mean they have more of a following than normal.

That's about it for now. I'll have some posts up in a few days. Thanks to anyone who reads this again. I would really appreciate some feedback.

E-mail me if you have any questions, comments, or even want to help expand Zombie Digest.

arthurkellycomedy@yahoo.com

artydroid@gmail.com

Keep Surviving

Arty K.

If 5 Could Join Me

2010-05-09T17:00:00.000-07:00

Survivors,

I was asked the other day a question by one of my friends. This question was damn well worth enough for a post on my blog.

Apparently my friends can’t think of unique questions cause the question I was asked was like a mixed question with a bunch of MySpace and Facebook surveys questions in one!

Make sense?

QUESTION: What 5 television or movie characters would you like to have behind your back during the zombie apocalypse?

Now before I answer this question, let me just say I thought deep and hard for a very long time about this. I chose my answers wisely and as badly as I wanted to use people from zombie movies, I didn’t. Trust me, Tallahassee from Zombieland is definitely an ass kicking zombie master. But he didn’t make the list.

These people did.

FUCKING ANSWER!:

1. Dexter Morgan from Dexter:

Has anyone ever watched Dexter? The serial killer killing killer who works for the Miami Metro forensics as a blood spatter analyst. That’s right, he’s a serial killer who kills bad guys only.This dude has a whole bag full of knives and drills and shit. He’d be awesome to have around. I mean sure he should carry a gun on him but he’s quick and isn’t afraid to kill anything.

2. Sylar from Heroes:

If you’ve ever watched Heroes than you’d know how really bad ass Sylar is. This dude is epic. I know it’s completely insane to trust the dude but he’s beyond deadly. He’s a mutant sponge which means he has everyone’s powers from Heroes which means he can’t die cause he’s been near Claire. Fuck it, this guy can whoop some zombie ass with the tip of his finger. Since he can fly and all there’s a good chance he probably wouldn’t stick around, but oh well. It would be nice to have his killing expertise!

3. Sawyer from Lost:

What would a zombie killing group of survivors do without the arrogant redneck in their group? Sawyer’s asshole ways and good aim will probably be needed when it comes to killing. He is fearless and is willing to do just about whatever it takes to survive. Sawyer’s personality might clash with others but that’s tough shit. He’s coming aboard.

4. Robocop from Robocop:

Yes I want fucking Robocop along with us. Dude can’t be transformed into a zombie because he’s a robot. He’s got a sweet gun which can add to the zombie ass kicking. I might take his gun and switch it with like a magnum or something. I know it won’t fit into his leg holster but Mr. Cop’s going to have to deal with that problem on his own. The only problem is I don’t have any of that brown poop stuff he eats in the movie... I wonder if it’s actually poop. Then he’d have an unlimited supply for a long time... ok that’s kind of gross but it’s survival haha.

5. Scarlett Johansson:

Strictly for her (ass) kicking abilities.

Ok she’s so hot and I couldn’t stand surviving in a traveling sausage fest. That’s that!

So I got a copy of Survival of the Dead which has been out in the UK for quite some time now and I never thought about downloading it from a torrent site until now. It’s hitting theaters soon but I’d like to watch it and give a review on it before then just so I can seem cool and important. I’m going to review it from a zombie fans perspective only. I’m not a movie critic haha. I don’t listen to movie critics anyway. They anger the shit out of me. All in all I don’t mind being one myself though.

Whatever.

More blogs to come. Thanks to all the sites giving me a plug. I really appreciate it all.

til the next blog.

Keep Surviving.

Mom, Romero, Plugs and... stuff

2010-05-07T18:29:00.000-07:00

This is a funny story that I must share. I had intentions of writing a relevant zombie post but I unfortunately didn't get a chance to finish it yet so instead I'll just share this with you.

Whoever the hell reads this haha.

I was talking to my mom about horror movies and the blog that I'm doing. She asked me if she could read it. We started talking about zombie movies that she's seen and although she hasn't seen many new age ones except for Shaun of the Dead and Zombieland (and I think she seen Flight of the Living Dead). She knows all of the "of the Dead" movies that Romero has done in the past. She was telling me all about the original Dawn of the Dead and Day of the Dead, and she even tried to explain to me about the black and white Night of the Living Dead. Thanks mom for the heads up, but I'm pretty sure I saw that one.

Since she was on topic I went ahead and said, "Hey mom, you do know Romero has done movies past 1990. They're just as good as his older ones". A bit of sarcasm led to her response which was this, "Who's Romeo?". Did my mom just say Romeo? I corrected and said, "George A. Romero? The mastermind behind the zombie films that you just mentioned." She was clueless! My mother who has seen a lot of his earlier films even the non zombie ones, was completely clueless on who the hell George A. Romero is. That's almost like an insult.

There's gotta be punishment now right? Does she deserve to be included in my zombie survival plan? I don't know. I mean it is almost mothers day so I can let her slide one time but I mean this is nuts! haha.

Yeah yeah yeah it's not that serious I know.

I'd like to do a few plugs as well.

MUSIC:

http://www.myspace.com/childrenofthenightmusic

These guys do Misfits style acoustic music. It's pretty intense stuff.

http://www.myspace.com/acousticmisfits

The same guys who do the Misfits style acoustic music. This time they're doing acoustic covers

http://www.myspace.com/thenightlifenj

Good friends of mine. They're really hard working guys when it comes to their music. Definitely worth the listen.

OTHER STUFF:

http://deadonyou.blogspot.com/

These guys do a zombie podcast. They're really awesome and they helped promote my blog. Give them a listen.

http://howtosurviveazombieapocalypse.co.uk/

If you're in the UK check these guys out. They do a live zombie survival guide. Unfortunately they're not in the US but see if they're coming near your town.

Happy Mothers Day mom

JUST ADDED: MAY 9TH, 2010

www.horrorschool.com

Awesome horror site where you can talk about anything and everything horror. Go and sign up!

Movie Review: Zombies of Mass Destruction

2010-05-03T10:43:00.001-07:00

First! I did mention that I was going to be doing movie reviews. I will talk about the good and the bad of each film. At the end of each movie I will rate it. I have created a rating system just now and it's pretty simple:

I will use brains instead of stars.

@ <-- (imagine it's a brain for now until I learn new graphing tricks)

@ = One of the shittiest zombies ever.

@@= I've seen shittier. Definitely worth the illegal download.

@@@= Decent flick.

@@@@= FUCKING KICK ASS MOVIE!

@@@@@= ONE OF THE BEST FUCKING KICK ASS ZOMBIE MOVIES EVER!!!

I think that's a pretty fair rating.

ZOMBIES OF MASS DESTRUCTION

Horror films in general have failed miserably for a long time now. There are movies that are considered scary because they have a few jump scenes in them and it usually has some kind of shitty plot... blah blah blah. A lot of the better zombie movies the past few years have had known actors in them, for example:

Simon Baker in Land of the Dead

Dennis Hopper in Land of the Dead

Vhing Rhames in Dawn of the Dead

Woody Harrelson in Zombieland

Cillian Murphy in 28 Days Later

I think you get the point.

I'm not saying known actors are a secret solid solution to making a good horror film, it just helps... a little. There are known actors through out the horror world that aren't really known through out Hollywood. Certain actors don't need the all around fame and that's what makes them awesome.

I was sketchy with Shaun of the Dead because I didn't know who those guys were but it ended up being one of my favorites of all time. Simon Pegg and Nick Frost kind of helped me out with a personal grudge I had against unknown actors and shit horror films.

I saw Zombies of Mass Destruction at Wal-Mart and I was curious to see it because on the cover it claimed that it was right up there with Shaun of the Dead (which I knew was bullshit from the beginning but I hadn't seen anything new with zombies in a long time so I bought it). Zombies of Mass Destruction is a part the "8 Films to Die For" After Dark Horror Fest 4 collection. I really don't pay no mind to those movies cause I get them confused with the Masters of Horror collection (which I absolutely hated). So with this being my first one ever, I gave it a shot.

To start off this review, all I'm going to say is that if you're a republican you're probably not going to like this movie.

The story takes place on this island called Port Gamble in Washington. There are a few main characters in this movie. You have the Iranian girl who often gets mistaken for being Iraqi and a terrorist. Then you have the gay couple who come back to the island so the one gay guy could come out of the closet in front of his mother.

The Iranian girl lives next door to a bunch of red necks people. The red neck family encourages their son to talk to her. During the outbreak all of the news stations were saying that zombie outbreak could have been an act of terrorism so immediately the close minded red neck people assumed she was part of the problem and tried to kill her.

The gay couple end up leaving the one guys house because his mom turns into a zombie. They end up at a real Catholic church who try to convert them to become straight.

I won't spoil anything else but it goes to show how dumb founded people really are. The director seemed to have a hard time piecing this movie together. I understand the point they were trying to get across about republicans and some of their racist and anti gay antics. They did it with zombies which is cool.

The gore in this movie is unbelievably awesome. I loved the blood, guts and gore. From peoples faces being ripped off to all of their limbs being ripped off. It was all there.

Choice of weapons in this movie were decent. There were hand guns and shotguns of course. I think the coolest weapon that was used was a machete (Voorhees style). The sound effects were completely lame though. When the Iranian girls father was hacking people to death with the machete it just made like a thud noise. They made a weed whacker look deadly in this movie... no, just no.

Hmm what else...

The ending was typical. I didn't expect anything out of the ordinary, especially since the movie had no real direction.

RATING: @@1/2

I'll give it two and a half brains for the gore, and the semi good acting. If you're a real zombie fan I think you should watch it at least one time. Don't buy it unless it's in a bargain bin.

That's all folks.

Keep Surviving.

DO YOU HAVE A PLAN?

2010-04-24T05:20:00.000-07:00

People who are smart and creative are usually good at planning things in life. They can plan birthday party's, weddings, communions, bar and bat mitzvah's, etc... But can they plan out a safe and effective zombie outbreak mission? Probably not. It's definitely rocket science to some people who usually doubt the fact that zombies will take over the world. That's fine, have fun thinking your minivan is a safe place for your little kiddies. In fact, bring a spatula to defend yourself, zombies hate a good spatulin.

SO! Do you have a plan? If you live in my town of Edison, New Jersey you do. Planning isn't as simple as you think. People watch a lot of zombie films and assume it's all about finding a building that's open to hide in. In some ways they are right but certain buildings have more usage to them than others.

I've created a point system off the top of my head that probably doesn't make any sense at all but whatever, let's give it a go.

The main thing's that are needed when trying to survive are:

Food
Weapons
Medical
Livable
Entertainment
Transportation

Now the point system is rated from 1 - 5 of these things #. Of course 5 being the highest.

WALMART

Food: #####
Weapons: ##
Medical: #####
Livable: #####
Entertainment: #####
Transportation: ##

The Word
Walmart is a great place all around to be during a zombie outbreak. They have a shit load of food especially if you can make it to one of those super duper Walmarts with the fucking food store inside too. The weapons are limited in the Jersey Walmarts. We do not have guns or anything that is explosive. Were forced to use knives and any lawn or sports items to defend ourselves. Medical is up of course because of the pharmacy and medical goods. Entertainment is key during an outbreak. If you're positive the zombies aren't able to come in, then it's okay to watch Airbud or the Jonas Brothers dvd's. Transportation meaning, 18 wheeler trucks that were left in the shipping area.

Ok So Walmart got a score of 24 our of 30. That's pretty good. If the place doesn't have more than 20 points then it's not worth the risk. If it's 19 points and you're desperate, it's understandable.

Let's try a few more.

Home Depot

Food: ###
Weapons: #####
Medical:
Livable: ###
Entertainment:
Transportation: ###

The Word:
It has a Nathan's in some of the Home Depot's near me so you'll be able to get refreshments, but not for long. You have all the weapons you need minus guns. Nail guns, axes, saws, and just about the most unimaginable ways to slaughter those dead fucks. It's an untraditional blessing in disguise. It's not really livable unless you can build a bed. But they have bathrooms and it is a big place. Transportation because they have trucks there. Unfortunately with 14 points, you're better off just passing by.

OKay, I'll do one more and then you can do this on your own.

Sports Authority:

Food: ##
Weapons: #####
Medical: #
Livable: ####
Entertainment: #####
Transportation: ##

The Word:
The food situation isn't good at all but at least there is some sort of food there. They have all those sports bars and sports drinks there to keep fit and full. The weapons I gave 5 thingy's because if you haven't noticed, Sports Authority has an infinite selection of rifles, shotguns, and hand guns. They also have bows and arrows along with a complete selection of hunting knives. If you want a challenge at killing zombies then you can head on over to the hockey, baseball, or golf selection and select a weapon of your choice too. Hopefully you can find the key that unlocks the big trigger lock that they put on the guns. The medical is shit, there's probably only sports bandages. It's definitely livable! Blow up your air mattress and grab a tent, it could be a long while before you feel the comfort of your own home bed. Entertainment if you're athletic. Transportation trucks, again.

The point of the point system is to help map out true destinations. It can help you avoid shitty places that have no purpose in your survival. Also, if your town is safe enough to do some light traveling, it's never a bad idea to go from place to place gather items and bringing them back to your temporary safe home.

My Plan in a nutshell

Gather the ones I love most.

Get vehicles to transport to destination.

Find a few 18 wheeler trucks.

Split people up in those trucks.

Truck 1: Sports Authority: Guns, Ammunition, Weapons of sorts, air mattresses, and communication devices (walkie talkies)

Truck 2: Finding a safe spot

Rendevue (hoping cell phones are still working at this point)

Each state has enough Walmarts to accommodate everyone. Luckily for me there is a Costco and a Walmart right next to each other. My team will stop there and build a safe bridge that will connect to both places.

That was a shitty quick run through of the Edison Plan. One day I'll post it on here for people to read. I think I mentioned before in earlier posts that I actually wanted to present it to the mayor of my town but I was scared that they might throw me in the looney bin... Which I'd rather be in than a house... Zombies can't bite through bars.

Who are they really punishing then?

Suckers.

Keep surviving world.

Zombified Celebrities:::Shoot? or Push away?

2010-04-15T14:31:00.000-07:00

So I was just currently brainstorming the zombie novel I will be writing this summer and I thought about some ideas from zombie movies that I'd like to incorporate in my book. In the remake of Dawn of the Dead, the group in the mall were were writing out celebrity zombie look a likes on the dry erase board and the dude across the way was looking for them and shooting them.

Watch what I'm talking about here. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vl438bQjbmE

I then thought...

What if I ever came across a currently deceased celebrity during a zombie outbreak??!?!?!?

There are a lot of cool dead celebrities out there... Ok first off. If I saw Michael Jackson I'd immediately shoot the fucker before he can get into his Thriller dance. Enough of that. I was a fan at one point but I don't trust him.

But yeah, there are a lot of dead celebrities that I'd have to think about before shooting in the brain. I know it's all about survival but come on, you really think you're going to instantly blow John Candy's fucking head off if you see him coming towards you? First off, no, you wouldn't. John Candy is fat and slow and he's probably the same cool guy dead as he was alive. I'm not shooting John Candy cause he'll probably ask me to go grab a 96 oz steak with him... IT'S JOHN FUCKING CANDY!!!

Hmm. who else?

Patrick Swayze... too early? Nah, him and Heath Ledger could be cool zombies. I wouldn't shoot either of those dudes. If Swayze starts busting out dance moves from that gay dancing movie he was in then I'd totally katana his limbs right off (anyone know where to find a good katana incase that happens?). Heath Ledger seemed like a cool dude. Way cooler than Swayze. Ledger would be a free zombie even though he did Brokeback Mountain. Gay.

Tupac's safe even though Tupac ain't dead. Or is he? I laugh because a lot of people think he's still alive and living in Cuba or something retarded like that. And every time a celebrity dies there's always an asshole who says, "They ain't dead, they're living it up in Cuba with Tupac". I'm like really? So you're telling me the dude who first played Dumbledore in Harry Potter is fucking smoking cigars and drinking Cristal in Cuba with Tupac? People are retarded. Tupac, I'm mad now and you're going down. Sorry bro. Well you're already down but if you ever turn into a fucking zombie I can't let you roam free and eat flesh.

Biggie, I didn't forget about you. You're East Coast. So we'll fly you over to California and eat those people. You're safe.

Quick List

---------------

Bernie Mac - No

George Carlin - No

Zelda Rubinstein (miniature lady from Poltergeist) - No

Corey Haim - No

Mr. Rogers - YES!!!!

Mr. Rogers and gorillas?

Just had a thought! What if Hitler starts a zombie reich? Should I head to Germany just in case? No no no no no no fuck. What about zombie dictators? or zombie murderers? Think about what Ed Gein would do if he came back from the dead. NOTHING, he was into flesh anyway.

I think when it comes down to the cool zombies, they all need their heads blown off. It's a real bitch to (re) kill someone cool but that is what survival is all about. Just think, one day (if humanity returns to its normal ways and the world isn't half destroyed and things like movies and music and Best Buy's and Wal Marts aren't completely destroyed off the face of this earth) I'll be able to tell my kids that I got to meet some of the most famous celebrities...post mortem.

For now. Keep surviving.

zTunes:::Zombie Killing Playlist

2010-04-08T15:37:00.000-07:00

There's nothing better than the thought of killing zombies. I always thought how useful iPods would be during the annihilation of a flesh eating zombie. Like anyone else on this earth, music gets my adrenaline going and there are certain songs out there that would definitely boost my stamina and aim by at least +2 points. If zombie games had an overall point system of zombie killing (kind of like how they rank sports players in video games) I'd totally be high ranked low. I think that would have to do with my size and speed. Regardless, music can change that whole picture.

I have come up with a top 10 list of songs I'd like to kill zombies to. These songs are in no particular order either. I'll also give the reasons why.

SONGS

1. Unearth - Black Hearts Now Reign: There's something about this song that wants to make my big ass two step but I can't. It's definitely an upbeat, unload your clip into the brains of some fleash eating corpse kind of song. Especially at the breakdown. This song all around deserves to played when the massacre of zombies begins.

2. Metallica - Fight Fire With Fire: I know that ZOMBIELAND used "For Whom the Bell Tolls" in the beginning of the movie which was amazing. With all due respect, that beginning was in slow motion. FFWF is by far an ass kicking song. It's fast, brutal, has a great title, and most importantly it's definitely something I'd like to hear during a zombiepocalypse.

3. KillWhitneyDead - Stop Crying Just Start Dying: Loveeeeeeeeee this song, and this band. I love how they add movie scenes into their songs. This song is bad ass. Every time I hear this I want chocolate milk. Whenever I drink chocolate milk I get the urge to point and shoot. When I point and shoot, I only want to kill zombies. So this song automatically makes the list.

4. Iron Maiden - Be Quick Or Be Dead: For any Iron Maiden fans, you know what I'm thinking when I add this song. The title alone says it all...I know it doesn't help me cause I'm far from fast but I'm also smarter than the average zombie killer so fuck off. Great song.

5. DMX - What's My Name?: Rap song? Really? HELLS YEAH! This song is seriously a song to fuck zombies up to. It's some serious gangsta rap music that gets me pumped and ready to use weapons I've never used before. Okay that was the stupidest thing I've ever written. Good song to kill zombies. If you don't believe me, then try it yourself (on zombies).

6. Every Time I Die - After One Quarter Of A Revolution: "Hearts aren't beating, they're counting down", is one of my favorite quotes in any song. This is my favorite band and I totally think this song qualifies to be a zombie killing hit.

7. He Is Legend - I Am Hollywood: This song is for all of you (if there are any) egotistical zombie killers who refer to themselves as, "Hollywood". I'm sure if Hulk Hogan were a zombie killer, this song would fit him greatly. I love this song cause it's upbeat and kickass (like all of the songs I have mentioned).

8. Mutiny Within - Lethean: I don't know if the song has anything to do with Star Trek but I don't really give a shit. It's a great song to kill zombies too of course. That's my main focus. These dudes are from my town and they're a cool bunch. Why wouldn't I want to listen to them during a zombie slaughter?

9. Deftones - Rickets: For a very long time this has been one of my favorite Deftones songs. It's always playing on my iPod during a Left 4 Dead or Dead Rising gameplay.

10. Lamb Of God - Broken Hands: I love LOG. This song sounds like it could be the finalizing song to an epic zombie escapade.

I'm pretty sure I could have come up with more songs but I didn't therefor this is my zombie killing set list. I just made the playlist on my iPod. If anyone reads this, what songs would you like to kill zombies to?

Zombie LEGS

2010-03-30T12:04:00.000-07:00

As all of you zombie fans know, there are various types of zombies in each movie that we see. I'm aware of the looks and all the other characteristics of zombies, but right now I'm focused on their legs and feet.

When zombies were first introduced to us they were slow and victims found it easier to get away from them. A fresh pair of running legs was your ticket to not being some dead human's dinner. Although in movies it seemed like no matter how fast the person would run, the slow fucking zombies always caught up.

The slow zombie is what I liked... maybe because I'm fat but that's completely irrelevant haha. I liked the typical arms up like Superman and the slow walk with the head tilted zombie. Whether or not they say "brains" is completely up to them.

The slow walking zombie makes a lot more sense. Their muscles have deteriorated and their fragile. It's like if they go any faster they'll crumble into dust.

I guess we can call them grave zombies? Grave zombies compared to the other zombies.

The zombies I hate are the zombies like in 28 Days Later and Zombieland. It's most likely cause they're fast and yes of course the #1 rule in Zombieland is Cardio. That means I'm fucked ladies and gentleman.

Zombies run fast though? What the fuck is that? I love those movies but c'mon. I know zombie movies can get a little bit repetetive and that it's always good to see something different. Why take out the fat people though haha? It's bad enough we can't be seated in a plane unless we pay for two seats. DOINKS!!!!!

shinfo, I know

Anyways. I'm not really angry about airplanes. I refuse to fly. FLIGHT of the LIVING DEAD, hello??!?!?

Anyways. Zombies who run fast obviously have a higher advantage from your typical grave zombies. It's kind of like getting mauled by a tiger, right Roy? OUCH stingggg!! Zombies that can run fast and maul humans and eat their flesh is probably a lot scarier than the slow moving zombie. If I see something walking towards me ready to eat me then I have a chance to drive away. If they run after me...

fuck it, aim for the brain.

Zombie Digest

2010-03-30T11:48:00.000-07:00

Welcome to the Zombie Digest blog. My name is Arthur Kelly and I have a slight obsession with anything zombie related. I know there are a lot of hardcore zombie fanatics in the world who would destroy me when it comes to showing true zombie passion. Dressing up and doing zombie walks isn't going to get you anywhere when the zombies take over (if they take over). Zombie's aren't stupid, SLOW but not stupid. That whole acting like a zombie thing in "Shaun of the Dead" will never ever work. They know the smell and aura of fresh flesh.

The purpose of this blog is to share any kind of zombie thoughts that come across my twisted brain. It could be about music, movies, video games, news all involving something with zombies. I'm sure this isn't the only zombie blogger out there. I didn't really check. I know a few haven't been updated since 2007. We can't have people slacking, can we?

Didn't think so.

Arty K